Such Is Life
by paper-cut2
Summary: Teenager from England has to go to America when her mother gets a new job.(Completed)
1. Default Chapter

Such Is Life  
  
pt1  
  
I had a boring upbringing in a piss hole little town in England. It was populated mainly by sheep and farmers, nothing exciting, nothing out of the ordinary, that was until the day I turned 15 and my Mom and Dad decided they had put each other through enough pain for the last 18 years and split. I can't say it was that much of a shock, I heard the late night arguments usually culminating in my mother throwing large objects at the wall and my Dad heading to the nearest bar, the nearest hooker. I thought life couldn't get any worse, then she got a new job.   
  
"Come and see your aunt in America!" she said one dismal day in January 3 months after they decided to go their separate ways. "We'll have a holiday, have fun!" She lied to me. The job was a given, she just failed to tell me this fact.  
  
We arrived in Texas, it was, to my dismay, much the same as the dreary place I'd just been dragged from, only the sheep were replaced by cows and the rain replaced by scorching hot sun! After 3 days of tip toeing around my 'uncle' (who wasn't really my 'uncle' just the scum bag my mother's sister decided to marry one drunken night in Las Vegas), my mother went out for the day. This continued every day for the next week, leaving me to sit in my room, staring at the ceiling, wow some fun holiday this was. I listened to the same arguments coming from downstairs day after day only in a different accent. My aunt was born and bred in England but had lived in the states for a number of years, who knew how long, but her accent was much the same unless she lost her temper and the occasional 'y'all' came spouting out. My 'Uncle' however had been Texas raised and I had a hard time understanding a damn word he said unless he was swearing, those words I understood in any accent. It made me wonder if that was the life women were supposed to live, cheating, drunken husbands, swearing and screaming at each other, after all it was all I knew!  
  
After I had a week on my own my mother came home one night to announce we were staying on! My heart sank, I didn't belong in Texas, I wanted to go home. But Texas wasn't where we were staying on at all. We packed up our shit and got into the rental and drove to a bus station. It wasn't until we were on the bus that she even bothered to tell me what the hell was going on. She had a job, with a prestigious company, as a photographer. No shit! I didn't even know my mother could use a camera, then again there hadn't been all that many happy family occasions where she would need one in our household! We were going to another bus station in Ohio where someone would meet us and then put us on another damn bus to go God knows where. I couldn't argue, I never did argue with my mother anyway, I found her to be a weak woman always aiming to impress for some unknown reason. I couldn't understand why, she was pretty enough without trying to prove it all the damn time! She had been a model when she met my father, I guess that's where I got my moderately decent looks from although I was no stunner! At 15 all I wanted to do was listen to boy bands and hang with my friends, fantasising about fame, singing in the hairbrush, I've never met a 15 year ld that didn't do that shit in some form or another. Now here I was 1000's of miles away from home, no friends, no boy bands, no hope. I felt like she had ripped me out of my old life, I had no words for what she was doing to me, and obviously she didn't care. She had her job, her new 'career' maybe I would just get in the way and she'd send me home to dad eventually.  
  
Arriving at Ohio we were met by two scruffy looking men in black polo shirts, I didn't take note of the logo on the breast pocket, maybe I should have then it wouldn't have been so much of a damn shock when finally we got off the coach and I was confronted with a huge Sign, "APPEARING TONIGHT WORLD WRESTLING FEDERATION - SOLD OUT!!" My jaw dropped, she had GOT to be kidding me right?  
  
I turned to my mother with an almost 'pleading' look on my face. she smiled and put her arm around me as she walked towards this huge building.   
  
"So sweetie, what do you think?" she smiled and I stared at her, still unbelieving she was actually going to put me through this crap.  
  
"I think you're crazy!" I said seriously and she laughed, like she always did when I said something she didn't much like, which is why I never bothered to argue with her in the first place. Everything was a big adventure for her since splitting with my father. It started with hosting crappy 'Avon' parties she got bored of that within 2 weeks and moved onto sex toys, although at the time I didn't know they were sex toys exactly, just that a bus load of middle aged women would come to the house and giggle uncontrollably while I was in my room (Singing into the hairbrush, dreaming of boy bands....you get the picture!)  
  
So here we were, where it was exactly I didn't know, didn't ask, wasn't told, but it was an arena, and my mother had landed a job with the WWF, a huge joke to me and my girlfriends for the past 5 years! We cracked up at these fully grown men on TV wearing lycra and glittery jackets! Said how utterly fake they all were and how they were all ugly, sweaty old men! Oh if my friends could see me now huh? I cringed as we entered the building. I cringed more as I was introduced to the men I'd laughed at, this was not happening! Who the hell was Randy Savage anyway? 


	2. Part 2

Such Is Life  
  
Part 2  
  
So that was my life. Most of it spent sitting on a crate while my mother went and did her 'thing'. Being told to be a good girl and sit there quietly! I watched her flirt with a bunch of sweaty old men just to get the slightest bit of attention, it sickened me but like I mentioned I didn't argue, I let her do her own thing, she was a grown woman who was I to stand in her way, a kid, most likely a burden but I didn't ask for it, for any of it. So we went from town to shitty town, all I saw of them was the arenas and the coach mostly. I had a tutor by now, paid for by my father who somehow decided he cared about my education if nothing else. Days were spent on the coach or in a hotel room studying but it didn't interest me, I went through the motions to please my mother, keep her happy, it was what I seemed to do best. Nights were for the most part speant in arena's, waiting around, bored, tired and usually with a headache from all the noise that went along with a WWF show. I didn't talk much, I was polite if someone spoke to me but never struck up conversation, this made everyone treat me like the little 'cutie-pie', so respectful, so polite when really I couldn't stand any of them and found them to be sad, false smiles and fake hair and that was just the guys! The women annoyed me. It was like a whole tribe of my mother all being led by men, being paraded like dogs at a dog show, it made me realise that really was all there was for life as a female! One step behind the male, following in his shadow, wiping his ass, raising his kids, cooking his meals and nights filled with arguments. Something to look forward to as I grew up!  
  
One night about 1 year after my mother got us into this crap, 'he' walked in. Just another meat -head, another punk with muscles right? So I thought. He spoke to me, his voice soft for his build.  
  
"Excuse me." That's all he said, I turned and saw the absolute 16 year old girl's fantasy, Shawn Michaels!  
  
I didn't speak back I looked at my feet, mumbled and side stepped out of his way, red in the face and biting on my lip. "Thanks!" he smiled, Oh God he smiled at me. I was ready to die! I was 16 and having my first real life 'lust' experience.  
  
For the next few nights I hung out with more enthusiasm than ever before, waiting, waiting for the 'Excuse me!' or the 'Thanks!' or anything, just a glimpse would have fed my desire to see him again, but whom was I kidding? He was older than me, I was a kid!  
  
Never the less I started experimenting with my mother's huge supply of make up, I ended up looking like Doink's younger sister although I thought I looked pretty cool. I must have looked like a total freak and if my mother had paid any attention to me maybe she would have helped me. But my mother was busy with other things, to my horror my mother was busy with Shawn Michaels. I rounded a corner and there they were, lips locked together....I stared! My own mother and my wet dream together! Life couldn't get much worse! I spent the next few nights alone on the bus, alone in the hotel, I wanted to die. I thought I was in love.  
  
The worst night of my life was when I was informed I was to spend the night in 'uncle Marty's' room on account of mommy and 'uncle Shawn' wanting some 'grown up's' time in our room. It wasn't the first night I'd spent away from my mother but I wasn't usually ousted from my own hotel room. I thought my chest would cave in from the pain, I was 16 not 6, I had a damned good idea what the 'grown up' time would consist of and I hated her for it.   
  
"What a cutie she is!" 'Uncle' Shawn ruffled my hair, winked at 'Uncle' Marty and I left with him, this stranger, this 'uncle' who was as much interested in being my 'uncle' as I was having it that way. I sat in his hotel room, not moving, hardly speaking incase my tears fell. My own mother, it was hard to take in.  
  
"Wanna watch TV?"  
  
I jumped at his voice and shook my head wishing I was a million miles away from that place, that company. He sighed and kicked off his shoes as he lay on the bed and opened a bottle of beer. I bit on my thumbnail, nervous and devastated. The TV was switched on as a noise was heard from my room on the other side of the wall. 'Uncle' Marty glanced at me nervously and cleared his throat, "You want a drink or something?"  
  
"No thank you."  
  
"Erm...well ah...mind if I watch TV?" he seemed as awkward and uncomfortable as I was. I shook my head and he lay back down with the TV remote in his hand, turning up the volume every time there was an audible 'bump' or moan from the next room. It disgusted me.  
  
I fell asleep on the sofa in that room and knew nothing until my mother stood above me shaking me awake, "We're ready to go sweetheart!" She beamed. I rubbed my eyes and looked around me, so used to being in a different room every night that it didn't even occur to me that I wasn't in 'our' room. It wasn't until I heard his voice that I sat up and tried to smooth my hair.  
  
"Ready?" he said a little impatiently and my mother nodded. "Have a good night with 'uncle' Marty then?"  
  
He came into my view, long blonde hair slightly unkempt, eyes sparkling, he made me feel weak at the knees.  
  
"Um er, y....yes thank you." I stammered still toying with the mass of unruly hair on my own head. He smiled and winked....he winked at me! My heart leapt into my throat then immediately fell into the pit of my stomach as he kissed my mother's lips before he left the room. 


	3. Part 3

Such Is Life  
  
Part 3  
  
I can count on one hand the number of nights I spent in the same hotel room with my mother during the following month. Needless to say I got to know 'uncle' Marty a lot better even though I could sense he was as pissed off with the situation as I was. We spent the nights playing cards or watching TV, he was an ok kind of a guy and in some ways I felt a little sorry for him being tagged with Shawn Michaels he didn't get an awful lot of attention, especially from the females!  
  
"How old is Shawn?" I asked one night in the midst of a game of 'fish' on the floor of his Hotel room. He looked at me puzzled.  
  
"He's 27 why?"  
  
"No reason!" I tried to hide my flushed cheeks. 27 meant 11 years older than me but more is the point it meant he was 11 years younger than my mother a fact that I reveled in for a few seconds. "My mom is 38 you know?"  
  
"Really?" Marty raised his eyebrows. "That's cool."  
  
I played another few rounds then threw my cards into a heap on the floor and sighed as I stood up and went to the window. "She's 11 years older than Shawn you realise?!"  
  
"Yeah I'm pretty good at math." he smiled and I realised I needed to shut up right them before I said something stupid. He walked to the window and stood beside me, leaning his arm on the glass and looking down upon another city. It occurred to me then that I didn't even know where we were, everywhere looked the same, every hotel room was the same, every face the same....every face but his, Shawn's that is. I couldn't get him out of my mind, it crushed me every time I saw him with my mother, it wasn't right. "Does your mom know how you feel about Shawn?" Marty asked matter-of-factly.  
  
"No well..." I stopped and gasped and he smiled. "I ah I don't feel. I mean I ...it didn't even..."  
  
"Relax!" Marty let out a low growling laughter, "I'm used to it by now, I see the signs before he even does!" he walked over to the mini bar and got out a beer. "Want one?" I hesitated then walked over and took it from his hands. It was that night, thanks to 'uncle' Marty I had my first taste of alcohol. I didn't like it, at first taste I almost spat it across the room, but I drank it anyway while he talked. "Shawn has that affect on most women!" he gulped some beer, "I guess you're mom doesn't know then huh?"  
  
"My mom doesn't care. Why should I burden her with my stupid problems!?"  
  
"I'm sure your mom does care. You just cant see it. Hell I wouldn't have seen it when I was 16!"  
  
He talked....and talked...and I felt weird, sluggish, I fell asleep.  
  
A few nights later, Marty hadn't said a word about Shawn or the beer, which I was grateful for. He didn't give me the knowing 'adult' look of disapproval every time I tried my silly little girl flirting act when my mom's back was turned. One night, much like any other I was sitting on a crate waiting for my mother to finish 'work', wondering if I would have the pleasure of spending another night in Marty's room, a hand touched my shoulder. I swallowed hard and turned slowly to see 'him' smiling at me.  
  
"Hey where's your mom?"  
  
"She's ah....she's ah..." I stammered not really liking these spur of the moment confrontations with Shawn, I liked to be more prepared. "I ah....I don't know!" I forced a smile, his hand still rested on my shoulder, I could feel it through my shirt, warm and soft.  
  
"Well she's not out there and she's not back here," he sighed, "Want a ride back to the hotel?"  
  
"I ah...erm....well...I mean...."  
  
"Ok get your jacket I'll meet you out front in 5." he smiled, patted my shoulder and left me there, dazed and confused.  
  
I couldn't speak in the car, I didn't have the nerve, I remember inhaling the scent of his cologne, when I look back now I realise I was bordering on obsession but I was 16 years old and I thought it was love at first sight! Other girls my age had their rock idols, movie stars, their Bono's, their Rob Lowe's, I had a real live idol. I had Shawn...except I didn't, my mother had Shawn! Night after night my mother had Shawn, my own mother. I realised the whole time these thoughts flooded my brain I had been staring at him, unblinking..... 1 more minute I would venture so far as to say I would have drooled had he not turned around! I stared into his eyes.  
  
"You ok?"  
  
My head snapped around and I looked out of the window, feeling ashamed, foolish, like I could smack myself in the head and probably would later on when I was alone.  
  
"I'm fine." I managed to barely whisper then cleared my throat, "Thank you." I said without turning around. We arrived at the hotel and went to the elevators. I had visions of him turning me around and kissing my lips, I willed him to do it, so much for telepathy. We got off the elevator and went to my room.  
  
"You have a key?" he asked, shuffling from foot to foot. I produced a key from my pocket and unlocked the door. The sight before me made me turn away quickly. My mother, on the bed with 'uncle' Marty! I gasped and turned around quickly, my head almost in Shawn's chest and for the first time in months not even thinking about him. How could she do this to him? My mind whirred with possibilities, it wasn't something a 16 year old was meant to witness their mother participating in! I looked up at Shawn's face ready to see hurt in his eyes but all I saw was anger.  
  
"Son of a..." he gritted his teeth as my mother and 'Uncle' Marty tried to cover their embarrassment too little too late. Something in me, I don't know what or where I would ever have the sense to do such a thing at 16, made me push Shawn backwards and close the door quickly, my back to it, facing Shawn in the corridor. I felt trapped, breathless, ashamed.......glad! Did I really think that? Yes I did, for a split second I was glad she was caught out! I felt bad for Marty but she deserved it didn't she? Shawn glared at me....or was it at the door?  
  
"Shawn I,......" What do you say? Sorry my mother is such a slut? Not the right words at that moment. I chose to keep quiet, bite on my lip and watch his every move, not that there was much movement to watch, he seemed frozen, breathing deeply, gritting his teeth, clenching his fists then he turned and stormed down the hall into a room and slammed the door, making me jump. I stared after him for what seemed like an eternity. In the movies I would have gone to him then wouldn't I? Comforted him in his hour of need? So much for movies! I waited another few minutes until the door was slowly opened, Marty peered out, making sure Shawn had gone before creeping out into the hallway. He looked at me shamefully, attempted to speak then thought better of it, or maybe the words didn't come who knew? He turned and went in the opposite direction.  
  
I ventured into the room, my mother was on the bed, smoking, something, it stank. I coughed and opened a window. She seemed so unconcerned at what had just happened it made me all the more ashamed of her.  
  
"Well shit huh?" She laughed stupidly, probably the Valium kicking in or whatever her drug of choice was for that day of the week.  
  
I didn't say anything I just looked her over, disgusted, my own mother and I felt such a loathing for her at that moment it scared me. I went into the bathroom and locked the door. I didn't want to see her, didn't want to be near her. I had a shower and when I came out again she was asleep, half her naked body hanging over the side of the bed, I turned away as I put a sheet over her. 


	4. Part 4

Such Is Life  
  
Part 4  
  
The next night at a live taping Shawn put Marty through a 'barber shop' window. Yes it was 'scripted' but I still say to this day that it was Shawn's idea even though he denies it. Needless to say we didn't see much of either of my 'uncles' after that and who could blame them? Eventually Marty disappeared altogether, I was never told what happened to him or where he went I guessed that was the nature of the business, they came, they went, and such was life. My mother was on pills for depression, pills to make her sleep, pills to wake her up again, it wasn't a pretty sight but I let her get on with it. Men took advantage of her but only because she let them. I had countless 'uncles' over the next year & the crunch came on my 17th birthday. Once again I was hanging out, I had started to watch the matches, sometimes, even though I was determined this business was not going to interest me. I got a card from my tutor that morning, very nice of her to remember since my own mother clearly hadn't. I was standing in front of a monitor trying to look uninterested when an envelope appeared in front of my face and I jumped.  
  
"Happy Birthday!" Said the voice from behind me and I froze.  
  
Gingerly I took the card from the hand that held it and turned around slowly. "Th....thank you I ah...I didn't know anyone even knew!"  
  
'He' smiled at me and shrugged, "I'm usually pretty good with dates!"  
  
"So I heard!" I mumbled then blushed hoping he hadn't heard or hadn't realised the implication. When I looked I saw that he had done both!   
  
He smiled at me and shook his head, "Don't believe everything you hear! Hope you have a good one!" he leaned in and kissed my cheek then walked away. I stood in stunned silence, my hand to the spot where his lips had touched my flesh, he'd kissed me. It was impossible to comprehend for a 17 year old with a 'crush' I stood there staring into space, not quite sure of what had just happened. When I look back, hell it was a friendly birthday kiss on the cheek, but to me it meant so much more.  
  
"What's the card for?" I jumped and spun around. The person before me was around my age, maybe older, long blonde hair to his shoulders and a smile that took my gaze away from everywhere else. "So?"   
  
"Sorry? What?"  
  
"The card!" He laughed and pointed at the envelope in my hand, "Someone's birthday or?"  
  
"Oh yes right erm it's mine actually."  
  
"OH cool! Happy birthday then!"  
  
"No not really!" I forced a smile still clutching the unopened card in my hands as if it were gold.  
  
"What's the problem?" he patted the crate beside him and I sat down.  
  
"No problem as such. My mother is probably off in sweet Valium heaven somewhere, witch is nothing knew I just..."  
  
"You thought maybe for one day a year she could lay off it for ya?"  
  
"Exactly!" I smiled. "I guess I shouldn't have expected any different."  
  
"I'm Chris!" he held out his hand and I shook it.  
  
"You're a wrestler?"  
  
"Developmental." He shrugged, "Thought it might better my career if I hung out, saw what went on ya know?"  
  
"Oh right."  
  
"And you are?"  
  
"Excuse me?"  
  
"Your name! I didn't get your name!" he laughed. "Or even why you're here for that matter!"  
  
"Oh right I'm..." I looked up to see my mother walking along the corridor towards us. "I have to go. Nice talking to you!" I smiled politely and went to her. 


	5. Part 5

Such is Life  
  
Part 3  
  
My mother disappeared with some guy that Id never seen before. I was left at the arena, no way of getting back to the hotel, and I didn't even care. Id walk, Id bum a lift, that's if I even went back there at all. I wandered around hoping maybe Id bump into one of the other photographers or ring guys that I knew, it was then I realised I still had the card clutched to my chest as I walked, unopened. It was crazy! I stopped and stared at it, the envelope didn't even have my name on it was blank but 'he' had given me this card when my mother hadn't even said happy birthday, my own mother! I stepped into a nearby vacant dressing room and sat on a bench with the envelope in front of me. Taking a deep breath I opened it carefully and pulled out the card. I didn't look at the picture, didn't look at the verse inside I just wanted to see what he had written, what he had written for ME! All it said was "Love Shawn", 'Love' my heart leapt into my throat as I read those 2 words over and over, staring at the stupid card in front of my face and reading, "Love Shawn', maybe he did care!?  
  
"Oh sorry I was....hey!" I jumped and stood up the card still clutched to my chest like it was my life support as the door opened. "Where's your Mom?"  
  
Shawn stepped into the room and my voice got stuck in my throat. I opened my mouth but no words would come as I stared at him. "Has she left you here?"  
  
"I ah...I...."  
  
"Jesus!" Shawn ran a hand through his hair, "Well kid come on I cant leave you sitting here they are about to lock up." He held the door open for me and I stepped into the corridor. 'Kid', great! "Come on lets go." he sighed and looked disappointed but I tried not to see it. Once again I found myself in his car, close to him, almost touching him, yet I couldn't help but feel a sense of panic as we pulled up in the hotel parking lot. Bad memories, maybe Id find her again like I did with Marty. We went up to our floor and I stood outside the door to my room. "Well go on then. I'll see ya." he winked and started to walk away. Something inside of me took over and my mouth started working before my brain had gained control.  
  
"She didn't even remember you know?" I blurted out as my hand was on the door handle. Shawn stopped and turned around.  
  
"Huh?"  
  
"My...my birthday. She didn't remember my birthday!" I hung my head as Shawn started to walk back towards me. "So I ah I just want to say thank you for the card...I appreciate it."  
  
"Look your mom..." Shawn sighed, "I think she maybe has a few problems y'know?"  
  
He was defending her! After what she had done to him he was standing in front of me defending her!  
  
"My mom has a lot of problems Shawn." I said quietly, not daring to even look into his eyes.   
  
He sighed and looked at the door in front of us. "You going in or do you want to celebrate?" Celebrate? He wants me to celebrate! I almost screamed and leapt into his arms! Instead I nodded, "I'm not going in."  
  
"Come on then! But if anyone asks your 21 ok?"  
  
"Ok." I said quietly and followed him down to the hotel bar. 


	6. Part 6

Such Is Life  
  
Part6  
  
So there I sat in a bar full of men, drinking my second ever beer with the guy I was head over heels for. Life couldn't be better!  
  
"Hey the chick with no name!" I turned, annoyed at the interruption of my thoughts.  
  
"What?" I snapped, not meaning to sound like a bitch, like my mother. It was Chris, the guy from the arena, the developmental guy. Oh great.  
  
"Erm Sorry. Hi, I didn't realise who it was."  
  
"Old enough to drink?" He raised his eyebrows at the bottle in my hand and I blushed. He smiled, 'Ok I'll take that as a no then!" he pulled up a chair beside us.  
  
"I'll leave you two to it then, gotta see a man about a bulldog!" Shawn smiled and walked away, I watched him leave willing him to come back. Stupid Chris!  
  
"So, your birthday getting better I see?" He grinned at me, stupid Chris!  
  
"Hmm yeah it was!" I took another drink from the bottle in front of me.  
  
"Ah right, well are you gonna tell me your name or do I have to guess?"  
  
"Rumplestiltskin!" I smiled sarcastically, "Save you the bother!"  
  
He laughed a stupid laugh. I wanted to slap him. "Ok then Rump!" he winked a stupid wink, I wanted to slap him. "How about I buy you a beer for your birthday?"  
  
"You old enough to drink?" I said sarcastically.  
  
"I'm 21." he said grinning a stupid grin. Oh how I wanted to....you get the picture? "So can I ask how old you are?"  
  
('If anyone asks you're 21!') "I'm 21 as well actually!" I lied remembering Shawn's words.  
  
"Yeah right!" he laughed and sat back casually in the chair with his stupid arm across the stupid chair next to him. I glanced around looking for my idol but he was nowhere to be seen, my luck! "Ok then miss 21 year old Rumplestiltskin, I'll buy you a beer!" he smiled and went to the bar. I got up and went to the ladies room. Why did my life suck ass?! There I was on my 17th birthday with the man of my dreams and I was stuck listening to the company clown! I washed my hands and ventured out of the door. There he was, the object of my teenage desire standing a few feet away with some other unimportant guys. I was about to go to him when I heard their conversation.  
  
"Yeah see you brought jail bait tonight Shawn!" One guy laughed.  
  
"Give me a break man!" Shawn moaned, "Her mother is a fuck up! It's the kids birthday and I felt sorry for her that's all ok?"  
  
I stepped back into the shadows, no, I wasn't hearing right, surely not, not Shawn, not 'my' Shawn! I listened some more.  
  
"Yeah that's your story and you're sticking to it right?" The other guy laughed and playfully punched Shawn on the arm.  
  
"It IS the story! Ok so I used to fuck her mother, guess I feel a little responsibility towards the poor kid! It's her birthday man!"  
  
No! My heart sank to my stomach, how stupid did I feel right then? How completely blind and completely stupid! Stupid stupid little girl!! Tears welled up in my eyes and I wanted to run, flee, scream, burry my head into a pillow in yet another faceless, nameless hotel room.  
  
"Beer?" A bottle was put in front of my face and I jumped. A tear rolled down my cheek as I looked at the clown with the bottle in his hand. I stared. "Are you ok?" He looked concerned, HA! I shook my head then foolishly looked back at Shawn, realising too late that I just gave my soul away to a stranger. I snapped my head around and faced the clown again. "Hey come on it can't be..." He saw me, saw the look I gave to my idol, my fallen idol. "Oh...." He raised his eyebrows. I ran. I shoved past Shawn and the unimportant idiots and ran. I ran straight out of the door and into the cold night air with tears streaming down my face. I didn't even know what city I was in, even if I had I still wouldn't know where I was going. A hand caught my arm and spun me around. To my dismay it was Chris.  
  
"Hey where are you going? You cant run out here on your own at this time of night!"  
  
I stared, I cried, he hugged me tightly. 


	7. Part 7

Such Is Life  
  
Part7  
  
We walked along the streets in the dark that night when my heart was broken. I don't know where we went, just walked, talked, I avoided any mention of Shawn and the way I felt about him, but Chris didn't seem to be that much of a bad guy when all said and done. We eventually headed back to the hotel, I wouldn't have gotten anywhere near back there if it wasn't for him, for which I was grateful. We went inside and the bar was almost empty, only a few people mulling around, 2 old guys asleep in one corner, leaning on each other, yet again another classy hotel.   
  
"Want me to walk you up to your room?"  
  
"Oh no, no thank you!" I forced a smile, I was freezing. Happy birthday to me!  
  
"How about a drink to warm you up then? Unless you're in a hurry to..."  
  
"I'm never in a hurry to go and see which drop out my mother has in her bed. Another drink would be great, thank you!" I smiled, unforced this time.  
  
By the time we headed up to the rooms it was 2am. I was almost asleep from the events of the night and the alcohol that I wasn't used to drinking. As we stood outside the door to my room he stopped and turned me around, "I'll see you around sometime then yeah?"  
  
"Was it a statement or a question? "I hope so!" I smiled.   
  
His lips pressed against mine, I'd never kissed a boy before, it was strange, unexpected. Gently he parted my mouth with his tongue and took me in his arms, it took my breath away as I tried to kiss him back best I could, movies and practice on my pillow or the back of my hand had not prepared me for such an experience as the real thing. He pulled back, I stood there, my eyes still closed, my head still up and he touched my cheek.  
  
"That's never happened to me before." I whispered barely able to get my breath. He laughed quietly and did it again. When he stopped he held me and whispered in my ear,  
  
"See? Now it has happened!" He pulled back to look at me and I stared into his eyes. "I hope that was ok for a first time!" he smiled warmly and I started to blush, "Although I fail to believe how such a pretty girl has never been kissed before!" He said quietly as he stared at me. I was at a loss for words. Literally stunned and excited all at the same time. I could feel my heart beating fast, like the way it did when Shawn was in the room, only this time Shawn was no where to be seen, just me and Chris. He held me again then said he had to go.  
  
"Can I See you tomorrow?" Now that was a question. I slowly nodded my head and he started to walk away as my eyes followed him, never leaving him. He stopped and turned around, "I never did get your name?!" He laughed.  
  
I had to smile, "Chris."  
  
"What?"  
  
"No that's my name! Christina." I smiled.  
  
He grinned & pointed his finger, "Perfect!" he winked and walked away. I leaned my back on the door once her was out of sight. I could still smell him, taste him, it was an unbelievable experience, maybe that's why my mother did it so often to so many different men! Maybe now I could begin to understand how wanted, how needed, how attractive someone felt when a member of the opposite sex paid this sort of attention to them.  
  
That night was the beginning of a beautiful relationship! Friendship and understanding came hand and hand with Chris and there wasn't very many days or nights I spent without him over the next 6 months. Most thoughts about Shawn started to diminish until he became just another guy that my mother used to toy with. I gave Chris my virginity, and after that night 2 months after we shared the kiss in the hall, I truly did understand why my mother was somewhere to the way she was. I didn't fully understand why she couldn't just be with one guy, like my one guy, my perfect one guy. Life started looking up, at last. 


	8. Part 8

Such Is Life  
  
Part8  
  
So Chris and I had been seeing each other on a daily basis for 8 months when the 'thing' happened that changed the course of my life, probably for the better although at the time it didn't feel like it. My mother's drug dependency had become worse, I ignored her, covered her up when she was unconscious, put up with her bullshit and mood swings when she wasn't, that was just the way my life was and I had my escape route, I had Chris.  
  
Backstage at another event my mother was worse than usual. She looked like shit when she turned up for work that night and when she took her pictures her camera hadn't even been loaded, not that anyone knew until after the fact. Her pictures were usually still good, basically because she was tripping when she was out there, gave her a whole new artistic perspective, she was even getting praised for them! Go figure! This one particular night I had stayed out of her way as much as possible, apart from the trip on the bus from the hotel to the arena I hadn't even seen her, but I saw Shawn. It was nice to see him now, I wasn't nervous, I had gotten to know him as a friend rather than put him up on high next to Tom Cruise and God, he was a nice guy. We talked, laughed, he asked about my mother, I told him honestly. He didn't seem surprised although I do know they had slept together once or twice since the night we found her with Marty and that was only the times I knew about. It didn't bother me anymore, not the way it used to anyway, this time I had more concern for Shawn, wondered why he even bothered with her. She was uninterested in anyone and anything around her other than her next 'pill-pop', she had even let her looks slide, I knew he was worth more than that, maybe he didn't. So we talked for quite some time, the show finished, Chris was with us, my mother came out. She glared at us, I thought she was totally wasted, I was right. She could barely walk in a straight line. When she saw us Shawn was giving me a hug, a friendly hug, he did that often those days, it was just the kind of guy he was. One time I would have been a quivering wreck on the floor, not now, I had Chris, and much as I still admired Shawn, thought he was a good looking guy, I knew I didn't love him, whatever Id felt wasn't love, lust maybe but not love. So she saw us, my mother, and tried to walk towards us. Instead of the usual "Hello" or some other friendly greeting a daughter would expect to get off her mother she slapped me. I didn't expect it, hell no one expects a slap like that from their own mother, out of the blue, no apparent reason. Her hair was all over the place, she looked like a wild woman. Chris acting on instinct to protect me and not thinking, hit her. She fell on her ass in a heap on the floor. All hell broke lose. It wasn't his fault, he wasn't thinking of who it was, he was standing up for me regardless of gender. I never blamed him for that, infect it made me love him more somehow and the thought never once crossed my mind that he would do the same to me, I was right on that count, he never did. Shawn grabbed my mother off the floor, people were running all over the place, she was having some sort of hysterical fit, tears and snot running down her face, I was ashamed of her. Chris stood there in shock once he realised what he'd done, then among the mayhem a voice boomed out!  
  
"WHAT IS THE MEANING OF THIS!?" the crowd parted and there he stood, the 'Jesus' of the wrestling world, Vincent McMahon. He looked at my mother frantically clutching to Shawn, Shawn looked like he'd rather be anywhere but there but there he stood and there he stayed, with her, like I said he was that kind of guy. Chris knelt down and helped me off the floor as someone whispered details into McMahon's ear. He glared at Chris. "Son do you have a contract here with us?"  
  
"Developmental sir."   
  
Vince took great huge strides to reach us, my heart pounded I thought he was going to hit Chris. He did, not physically, but where it would hurt him even more. "Consider it terminated." Was all he said then turned on his heel and went to my mother's side. "Ma'am are you alright?"  
  
She whimpered, my anger for her grew more and more, bubbling up inside, I hated her.  
  
Once the initial commotion had died down and the four of us were left facing one another my mother commanded me back to the hotel.  
  
"No." I said calmly.  
  
"NOW!" She growled and went to grab me, Shawn stopped her.  
  
"I'm not going anywhere with you." Again my voice was calm, normal. I wanted to slap her but I would never treat my own mother the way she treated me, no one deserved that.  
  
"Get into the damn car and get back to the hotel immediately young lady!" She snapped.  
  
I looked to Shawn for some sort of help, any sort, she was irrational, high & I wasn't going! He hung his head, "She's your mother, do as she asks!" he said quietly.  
  
My jaw dropped I couldn't believe he betrayed me like this! Not Shawn!  
  
"I.....but I...."  
  
"NOW!" she yelled and I jumped. I looked at Chris and he was still stunned, he looked like a deer caught in the headlights, after all what could I expect I had just cost this guy his whole career. I didn't think I'd see him again as she dragged me to the car. I saw him step forward to help me but Shawn put a hand on his chest and shook his head. He said something to him, I didn't know what at the time. Tears stung my eyes, she couldn't do this to me not when I was so happy! 


	9. Part 9

Such Is Life  
  
Part 9  
  
So, I was dragged into the car, dragged into the hotel and dragged into the room by my mother, freaking out and Shawn trying to calm the situation but always one step behind, at that moment I thought he was as bad as she was. She slammed the door on him, left him out in the hallway banging to be let in, that was when she set upon me, called me a slut, said Id been sleeping with Shawn since I was 15, because someone had 'told' her, it must have been true. No matter what I said she wouldn't listen to me, I screamed the words at her to try and make her understand me but none of it was getting through the 'pill' barrier, she just didn't hear me. She grabbed me by the hair and threw me against the wall. It hurt but I made no sound other than a slight whimper that I could not stop escaping my lips when the pain seared through my body. Shawn still hammered on the door, frantically telling her to calm down, to let him in, she wasn't hearing that either. She had snapped, lost it, she continued to hit me, punching me in the face, arms....I blocked it out, floated away to a better place. Eventually Shawn kicked the door in just as she was lifting me off the floor by my hair for round 2. He grabbed her and I felt someone grab me, I looked up, it was my angel, my saviour, he had forgiven me. He lifted me off the floor, she still screamed and kicked as Shawn had her around the waist.  
  
"You are NOT seeing him!" she bawled, "He hit me! Keep away from my daughter you son of a bitch!" she hissed at him, spittle flying from her mouth. I was scared, this was not my mother, the woman that raised me. It was more like a scene from a B movie, I could picture the credits "DRUG WOMAN FROM THE CENTER OF THE EARTH!" (what things go through your mind when your world is crashing around you?!) Shawn managed to drag her to the bedroom and throw her onto the bed( practised manoeuvre I was betting), he banged the door shut but it had no lock. She screamed and beat her fists on the wood, pulled at the handle as Shawn held it shut. He looked at Chris and I standing there, feeling like the Twilight Zone was upon us!   
  
"GO!"  
  
"What?" I brushed the hair from my face.  
  
"Go! GO NOW!"  
  
"I don't have anywhere to go!" I said panicking.  
  
"Chris get her away man! Go...just go! You'll be ok!" He strained as she pulled at the handle again. Chris nodded slowly, he knew what he had meant, something to do with the 'words' that he and Shawn had at the arena maybe?  
  
"Shawn I can't leave... I can't just leave dammit!" I started to cry. Chris grabbed my arm and started to pull me towards the door. "I can't go!" I cried but it was more in defeat, I knew that was exactly what I was about to do.  
  
"I'll take care of her just..." Shawn sighed and dug into his pocket with his free hand. "Here!" He put some notes into my hands.  
  
"No I can't take this!"  
  
She pulled on the door again and he had to put two hands onto the handle as it came open slightly, "You just did take it now GO!" He strained against her force on the door, "Take care of her!" he said sternly to Chris and Chris nodded again, still with his hand on my arm.  
  
"CHRISSY!!! MOMMY LOVES YOU BABY LET ME OUT!"  
  
I looked at the door frantic, my mother was in there, my own mother, I wanted to go to her, hold her, look after her, she needed help.  
  
"Please just go!" Shawn said quietly as we listened to the pained sobs from the other side of the door.  
  
I threw my arms around his neck, he couldn't hold me, he had both hands on the door, but he put his head on mine and I held onto him tightly. He nodded at Chris over my shoulder and I felt Chris' arms around my waist, he had to virtually carry me away from her. We got into his beat up old car and he drove God knows where we were going to end up. 


	10. Part 10

Such Is Life  
  
Part 10  
  
We ended up that night in a 'roach infested motel about 30 miles away from the hotel, 30 miles away from the woman that used to be my mother. It was cold; it was raining and the roof leaked on Chris' car so any room was good, roach infested or otherwise. I couldn't get my head around what was happening, it was all too crazy, too fucked up. I cried a lot the first couple of days. We just kept moving, not knowing where to go or when the little money we had was going to run out. Chris got jobs, bar work here, laboring there & I would have too if he hadn't insisted that I was too young to work & that he would take care of everything. I felt so guilty that he had given up his dream for me, one stupid mistake and that was it. I told him to go back and talk to Vince on numerous occasions but he wouldn't, whether it was pride or fear I never knew. Every night we lay curled up together in another motel, he would hold me; tell me it was all going to work out, not to worry. But all could do was worry. We had no home, no money and Chris now had no dreams, I was destroying him the way my mother so obviously destroyed my father. We never argued even under all the stress that we were, he was always loving and understanding, I didn't know why, I'd never known a man in my whole life that was like Chris. I kept telling him how sorry I was but he didn't want to hear it. He would smile, that always won me over whatever situation we were in at the time, that smile.....it just seemed to make everything ok no matter what.  
  
"We're gonna make it baby!" he would tell me, "We're fine and one day I'm gonna be a wrestler making big bucks and put you in a mansion!"  
  
"With a pool!" I would smile.  
  
"Hell yeah a pool!" he held me tight as we lay on the stinking bed trying to keep warm.  
  
"Somewhere warm, like Florida maybe!"  
  
"Definitely Florida!" He agreed as I closed my eyes and pictured it. I could see it, I hoped he could too. I prayed he wasn't just making it up for my sake; I wanted him to believe in it, give him some hope that he would be a star one day!  
  
We drove to another town, I can't even recall where it was now, somewhere in South carolina if my memory serves me correctly and there was a huge billboard as we entered, Chris stopped the car and got out.  
  
"What are you doing?" I said sleepily as I watched him go to the sign and stare up at it. I got out and followed him, as I reached his side I rubbed my eyes and looked up. In front of us was a huge sign for a show that was in town, a WcW show!  
  
"Check it out!" Chris said in awe with a weird look on his face.  
  
"Wrestling?" I raised my eyebrows.  
  
"Hell yeah come on babe!" he dragged me back to the car and we sped off both of us laughing and cheering. This could be it, I prayed it was, he was good enough and I was certain if it hadn't been for my stupid mother he would have been a star already!  
  
We pulled up outside the arena, "SOLD OUT!" was plastered all over the front entrance as people started to make their way inside. We went through pockets to see what money we had, it wasn't much but it would at least get him a ticket. He argued that he wasn't going in without me but I insisted, it wasn't something I did very often with Chris but I eventually persuaded him to go and try to buy a ticket from one of the fans in the queue. I watched as he went from one to another holding our little bit of money in his hands begging for a ticket. It made my heart bleed. He came back looking deflated and slumped into the drivers seat.  
  
"No luck?" he shook his head, "Here!" I fidgeted and took off the gold chain I wore around my neck that my father had given me.  
  
"No! No way you put that back on right now!"  
  
"No Chris! You need to get in there to see someone! There's no way you are getting in the back entrance, take it!"  
  
"I cant do that! We're already spending all the money we have on a ticket I feel guilty enough about that!"  
  
"Take it, please, for me just take it! I don't need it, its just stuff ok?" He eyed me dubiously, "Stuff!" I said again and placed it in his hand. He leaned across and kissed me softly on the lips.  
  
"Sure?"  
  
"Yes now go!" I playfully pushed him out of the door and watched. The 32nd person he asked (Yes I counted! I was terrified he wasn't going to get in!) Actually took the money and the chain and handed him the piece of paper! My heart leaped into my throat as he bounded back over to the car waving the stupid thing and grinning like a Cheshire cat!  
  
"I got one!" he leaned into the window then his face changed, "I cant leave you out here all night!"  
  
"Yes you can!" I laughed, "Yes you are ok?"  
  
"Will you be ok?"  
  
"I'll be fine now go and if you have to sleep with big burly bouncers to get to speak to Bischoff then do it! just don't tell me about it!" I smiled and he laughed and shook his head.  
  
"Yeah maybe I'd rather we just ate beans for the rest of our lives huh?" He leaned in further and kissed me. "Lock all the doors and keep the windows shut ok?"  
  
"I will now will you go already?" I playfully slapped him.  
  
"I'm gone! I'm gone!" he held up his hands and winked at me as he walked back to the doors. He took one final look at me sitting in the car and I showed him my crossed fingers as he went inside. The emotions going through my head right then were unbelievable! I knew he could do it! If anyone could do it, get to talk to someone, get to show them what he could do it was Chris! He had so much confidence, so much charm I was sure he'd be working for WcW by the time he headed back out of the doors! 


	11. Part 11

Such Is Life  
  
Part 11  
  
I sat in the car and waited, biting on my finger nails, willing him to any kind of success. Even the slightest good word would be better than nothing! It amazed me how he never let it get him down. Hell he hardly even mentioned wrestling, he just did what he had to do without bitching or complaining, maybe he always knew deep down that his chance would come again? All this time I thought he'd given up his dream when all he'd been doing was hiding it, that was plain to see from the look on his face when we saw that poster! I smiled to myself; he'd looked like a kid in a candy store at the mere sight of a billboard. I wondered would he have done the same if it had been a WWF show advertised? I didn't think he would have but then again with Chris you never could tell, that was what I loved about him, he was so deep that I didn't think I'd ever figure him out of we lived to be a hundred!  
  
I was so tired sitting there and I wanted to walk around but I remembered what he'd said so instead I watched the stars from the window, curled up in his shitty car, no money, no food, none of it mattered if he could came out of that arena with some hope! My eyes wanted to close but I couldn't let them, I forced them to stay awake for the longest time and eventually I had to give in, I slept.  
  
It felt like hours later when I heard the car door open when in reality it was probably only 30 minutes. I jumped and rubbed the sleep from my eyes as I sat up. He got into the driver's seat and it didn't look good, he looked disappointed. I touched his arm and waited fro him to speak, it was a long time coming and I felt like I was holding my breath.  
  
"Well, I guess that's that then." He said quietly.  
  
"Oh Chris I'm so..."  
  
He turned to me and grinned, "I've only got a trial back here tomorrow!"  
  
My jaw dropped, he'd done it! This was it! He laughed at the look on my face, I couldn't speak; I really thought he'd been knocked back. "Well? Aren't you gonna say anything? Hug me?" he held his arms out and I leaned into him.  
  
"I....I don't believe it!" I said still in shock.  
  
"Well believe it sweetheart! I told you! We're on the way up!" He shouted and held me tightly as he laughed like a child.  
  
I started to laugh, it was that or burst into tears and we weren't exactly there yet, he still had the trial to get through.  
  
"Oh God!" I looked at him and brushed his hair back as I held his face in my hands," Is this real?" I laughed.  
  
"Yeah it's real!" he kissed me and pulled me onto his lap so I was facing him. "I love you!" He said as he kissed me. I was happy, truly happy, I didn't think it got much better than that! "Come on then!" he shoved me towards my seat and I slid over as he started the engine.  
  
"Where are we going we don't have any money?"  
  
"We're going to a hotel!"  
  
"A...how.... we can't afford a hotel!" I stared at him in disbelief.  
  
"No you're right we can't.... but Eric Bischoff can!" he grinned.  
  
"You're kidding me?"  
  
"Do I look like a joker?"  
  
"Erm...."  
  
"Ok ok!" he laughed, "But no I'm not kidding!"  
  
"Jesus let's go! I'm freezing!" I laughed as he pulled the car away from the arena. I don't know how he did it, I never even asked, it wasn't important. All that was important was he was getting a try out for WcW and the fact that we would be sleeping in a clean bed for the first time in months sounded like heaven!  
  
We must have looked ridiculous in that hotel lobby, our clothes all crumpled, dirty old sneakers on our feet and shivering, probably more from excitement than cold. Chris put his arm around me as we stood at the desk and the receptionist handed the key over, the key to a warm, clean room with hot water! We almost ran up the stairs, we couldn't even wait for the elevator!  
  
We opened the door and peered inside, it was awesome! Like we had never seen a hotel room before! He grabbed me and threw me onto the bed and I screamed. "Awww man! Feel this bed!" he jumped up and down like an idiot then lay back and spread out.  
  
"Screw the bed I want a bath!" I ran to the en suite and the sight of a purely white bath tub made me squeal in excitement!  
  
"What is it?" He said from behind me  
  
"Look!" I pointed at the bath and he burst out laughing and grabbed me from behind. I leaned my head back on his shoulder. "How come Eric is paying for all of this?"  
  
"Well he asked where I was staying and..."  
  
"Oh you didn't tell him we were sleeping in the car?" I put my hands to my mouth as I turned around.  
  
"Wasn't it a bit obvious we weren't staying in the Ritz?" he held his arms out and looked down at his clothes.  
  
"Oh Chris!" I playfully hit his chest. "You shouldn't have told him!"  
  
"Hey if I hadn't then we wouldn't be here right now we'd be out in the parking lot looking up at these windows while the rain dripped on our heads!" he smiled. "What would you rather have?"  
  
I hugged him, "I'm sorry I put you through all of this!"  
  
"You didn't!" he held me at arms length, "I put me through this! Me ok? Not you! I wouldn't be here now if I didn't want to be!"  
  
"I know." I smiled, "Now I have to be the first to try out this tub!" I giggled and went to turn on the hot water. 


	12. Part 12

Such Is Life  
  
Part 12  
  
I stood and watched as the steam filled the small bathroom & I welcomed the warm, damp air on my face. It seemed like forever since I'd been truely clean and warm!  
  
"Hey lookies what I found!" Chris tipped something into the bath.  
  
"Chris! What if we have to pay extra for that!"  
  
"It's only buble bath, besides it's comp-li-men-tary!" He said sarcastically as he pointed to the word on the bottle.  
  
"Real bubble bath!" I sighed.  
  
"Yeah don't think you're getting in there on your own either!" Chris started to pull his clothes off and 5 minutes later we were soaking in a deep hot bath full of scented bubbles. It felt like heaven! I lay back in his arms and he put bubbles on my hair as he stroked it. "We can do this every night when I get this damn job!"  
  
"Hmmm yeah, man I can't imagine it!" I smiled to myself, things clicking into place, hopefully! "You will get it I know you will!" I said as I ran my hands over his arms that encased me in the hot water.  
  
"Babe if he offers me fifty bucks to put the ring up every night I'll take it!" he laughed and kissed to top of my head, "We've done alright though really haven't we? I mean we haven't starved exactly!"  
  
"Not exactly!" I smiled, 'Yeah we've done ok, same as we will do ok if tomorrow turns to shit!" I laughed but I felt him tense up under me and bit on my lip, realising what I had said hadn't sounded very good. "I didn't mean it would! I know t won't I just meant..."  
  
"It's ok! I know what you mean!" I turned around so I was facing him and he smiled and touched my cheek. "It's ok! It'll be sweet! Trust me!"  
  
"I do!" I smiled and leaned in and kissed him. It was over an hour later when we dragged ourselves out of that hot water, wrapped our bodies into hotel robes and climbed onto the bed.  
  
"OH my God! TV!" Chris grabbed the remote control and sat back on the bed with me lying between his legs.  
  
"Heaven!" I giggled as he switched it on. "Wonder if WWF is on?"  
  
Chris snorted, "Yeah like I'd watch that trash!"  
  
"Oh come on! You really wanna watch it I can tell!" I turned around and tickled his stomach and he laughed.  
  
"No way man I'm a WcW guy these days!" He laughed and pulled me up to face him, "Or at least I will be a WcW guy this time tomorrow!"  
  
"Yeah you will!" I smiled and kissed him. He put his hand inside my robe and I caught my breath as it touched my naked flesh. "I love you." I whispered.  
  
"Mmmmmm I love you too!" he said, sounding breathless and excited as my hands undid the belt on his robe and stroked his chest. I often wondered at times like that, why me? Why did he want me? I was nothing, plain even but I had this fantastic guy and he wanted me! It was hard to take in, hard to understand but here he was anyway, my Chris, my clown! He pulled me totally on top of him as he sat and we made love for the second time that night. He made me feel like no one else in the whole world ever had. I didn't know it could be like this, not after seeing my aunt and my mother go through years of being unhappy. I wondered if maybe my mother and father had once been the way Chris and I were? If that were true then maybe we'd go the same way they did? It terrified me, I couldn't imagine living without him. I also couldn't imagine living with him the waymy mother had put up with my father for so many years, miserable, fighting until they hated each other. I hoped I would never hate Chris. 


	13. Part 13

Such is Life  
  
Part 13  
  
We lay in each other's arms watching heaven on a square box, (infact it was MTV but it was close enough after the 6 months we had just been through!) It was warm and cosey and comfortable and I wasn't afraid to put my head onto the clean white pillow, wasn't afraid of being bitten or afraid that I'd be woken up in the middle of the night to another argument or gang bang from the next room. I didn't want to close my eyes though, I wanted to stare at the TV screen all night, savouring it, enjoying every moment of this time we had before it all might come crashing down again. I couldn't though, my eyes were heavy & I snuggled into Chris' chest and he held me as I fell asleep.  
  
I don't even know what time it was when he woke me as he lept off the bed in a panic!  
  
"What the hell...Chris what's wrong?" I sat up trying to shake the sleep from my head, feeling light headed, unsure if I was awake or dreaming.  
  
"My stuff!" He pulled at his hair as he stared at me. "My stuff!"  
  
"What stuff? Chris what's wrong?" I scrambled across the bed and grabbed him around the waist.  
  
"I have nothing to wrestle in tomorrow man!" He said frantically. "What am I gonna do now?"  
  
I Pulled him onto the bed and he sat down with his head in his hands.  
  
"Where's your old stuff?"  
  
"In the bag man I can't wear that! It's not been out of that bag in 6 months! It'll stink!"  
  
"Give me the bag!" I held out my hand.  
  
"What? What good will it do?" He stood up, grabbed the bag and handed it to me. I pulled out some stinking old clothes and threw them onto the floor until I found his old tights. He was right, they were awful and filthy and stank! I wrinkled my nose up as I held them up with my finger tips. "I told you!" he said in dismay. "That's it then! Screwed!"  
  
"Don't panic!" I got off the bed with the tights still held at arms length and went into the bathroom.  
  
"What are you doing?"  
  
"Well I'm going to try and wash them!" I put my head out of the doorway, "Will you stop stressing?" he put his head in his hands. I'd never seen him stress over anything, all we'd been through and not once had I seen him in this state! It showed to me just how much this all meant to him. I had to try and help!  
  
I had to wash them in bubble bath and even after scrubbing them several times they still weren't the best! At least they were in slightly better condition than when I started! I came out of the bathroom, he was pacing the floor in his boxers and I smiled as I held up the tights.  
  
"They are a little better!" I said and held them out to him.  
  
He took them from my hands and studied them under the light bulb. I hoped they would do, I couldn't do anything else for him, he was on his own, at least I could help with this. "Hmmm." he said as he looked them over.  
  
"Give them here!" I smiled as I took them back and went to the wardrobe.  
  
"What are you doing now?"  
  
"Well they are gonna need to be dry before you put them on surely?" I laughed.  
  
"Why are you so smart?" he smiled.  
  
"I dunno I guess it's the company I keep these days!" I kissed his cheek as I put the tights onto a hanger and opened the window.  
  
"What the hell?" he stared at me as I hung the hanger on the curtain rail so they would dry in the breeze. "I would never have thought of that!" He laughed.  
  
"That's because you're not a woman!"  
  
"I should hope not after what we just did!"  
  
I wrinkled my nose up at him and he laughed. "Going from hotel to hotel with my....." I stopped, my mother, Ha that was a laugh, only I wasn't laughing. If she hadn't been the way she was we wouldn't even be in the situation we were in now! I wondered what she was doing? Was she curled up in a safe warm hotel bed every night while her only child wandered the country with no real home, no real safety? Did I ever even cross her mind at all? I didn't think so, she would be way too busy with her life,her drugs, her men, to give me even a second thought! (Made me wonder about Shawn also! What was he doing now? was he still screwing the old hag? I didn't like to think she would be that lucky!)   
  
"Say what?"  
  
"Huh?"  
  
"You were saying something?" Chris touched my arm & I smiled.  
  
"Was I? Well it was nothing important! Come on get back into bed its freezing with that window open!" I dragged him to the bed. "NOW can we go to sleep? PLease?" I whined.  
  
"I guess so! I'm sorry for waking you!" he kissed me.  
  
"That's ok, I'm glad I could do something! It's not like I can get in the ring and do this try out for you, or I would!"  
  
"Maybe that's not a bad idea!"  
  
"Yeah right!" I laughed.  
  
"I'm so nervous,what if I screw it all up!"  
  
"You won't! Trust me once you get back into that ring it will just all come back to you!"  
  
"You think?" he squeezed me tightly to him.  
  
"Yeah I know!" I smiled, "Unless of course you don't let me get to sleep then you might be way too beat up to perform tomorrow!"  
  
"I knew I should have let you in the ring!" he laughed. "Goodnight babe!" he squeezed me again and kissed the top of my head.  
  
"Goodnight superstar!" I laughed. 


	14. Part 14

Such Is Life  
  
Part 14  
  
Next morning Chris was awake before me. I woke up with the sun streaming through the window and, apart from the obvious panic in the midle of the night, I realised it had been the best night's sleep I'd had in 6 months! I stretched and caught sight of him pacing the floor, biting on his thumbnail and my heart went out to him. I wished I could take it all away, give him the damn job without the try-out, he was good enough, admittedly I hadn't actually seen him in a match, only in practise, but on the odd occasion I had been interested enough to watch a show I saw that he could have wiped the floor with half of the unfit old men that the WWF had to offer. I only hoped Eric Bischoff thought the same way.   
  
I got off the bed without him even noticing, he was so caught up in his thoughts and I put my arms around him willing the nerves to jump into me instead of him, he didn't deserve to go through this. He jumped slightly and then leaned his head back on my shoulder.  
  
"How long?"  
  
He looked at his watch, "Half an hour so you better get dressed!"  
  
"You want me there?" I said surprised and he turned around in my arms.  
  
"Yes, I need you there, right there in the same room."  
  
"Ok." I smiled, "If you're sure!"  
  
"Positive, you're my lucky charm! Now go I don't want to be late!" he smiled and kissed me.  
  
Lucky charm? I hadn't been exactly lucky for him thus far!  
  
I got dressed into the same old clothes I had been wearing the day before and it made me wish I had washed everything during the night while I was washing the tights! I tied my hair up, at least that was clean, and I got it as tidy as I could without the use of a hairbrush. As we were leaving the room we both stopped and looked around.  
  
"Man I wish we were staying here tonight!" Chris sighed.  
  
"Yeah well it'll come! At least we had that night huh?"  
  
"Yeah!" he smiled as we closed the door and went down into the lobby to hand over the key and go back to our usual way of life, sleeping in the car, although hopefully for the last night if everything went well.  
  
Chris drove to the arena and we pulled up outside. He sat and stared at it, lost in his own world. I grabbed his hand and squeezed it tightly and he turned and smiled at me.  
  
"Here goes nothing then huh?"  
  
"No, here goes everything! You're gonna do it I know you are!" I touched his cheek.  
  
"What if I don't?"  
  
"If you don't then we carry on as we were, we're alive and we're together and screw the rest of it I don't care!"  
  
He laughed slightly and hung his head, "I'm gonna do this right?"  
  
"Right!"  
  
"Ok." He took a deep breath, "Ok." he said trying to convince himself. "Let's get this over with!"  
  
We got out of the car, each step we took towards the doors felt like a step towards a new life, I hoped with all my heart that my feelings weren't leading me astray, I prayed he wouldn't fail, but not for my sake! He had everything pinned on this, I needed him to do it for himself, for his confidence, for his life. I couldn't imagine what it would do to him if they didn't give him a chance, what it would do to us if Chris thought he had failed me. He'd be devastated and I couldn't see him doing any other job! He wasn't a barman or a builder or a painter, he was a wrestler, he needed to be a wrestler. As we pushed open the door I said a silent prayer, I wanted it to work out, just for him. 


	15. Part 15

Such Is Life  
  
Part 15  
  
Stepping into the huge main arena was probably the most humbling experiance I was ever going to have. Everything seemed larger than life, unreal somehow. Chris gazed around in awe of the place, as if he was seeing an arena fr the first time in his life & I smiled when I saw the child-like look on his face! We walked around for a while not really sure of where he was meant to be. Wrestlers were in the ring already, warming up, working out or going through matches & some of them gave us a glance as we passed, but never anything more. They were uninterested in the rookie that walked before them with eyes like dinner plates!  
  
"Shit there he is!" Chris whispered and I followed his gaze until I saw the man he was staring at so intensly, the man that held our future in his hands, Mr Eric Bischoff. He spotted us almost the instant we saw him and waved us over.   
  
"Mr Irvine. Nice to see you again!" he smiled warmly and shook Chris' hand. "Glad you could make it!"  
  
"Thankyou sir." Chris said nervously, "Glad you could spare the time to see me!"  
  
"Well how could I not? You initiative to get to see me yesterday was enough to prove you were serious!" he smiled and I glanced at chris, still unaware of what had actually occoured the previous night when he had somehow talked his way into getting a meting with this guru of the wrestling world. Chris forced a smile as Eric put a friendly arm around his shoulder and started to walk away. I looked around and quickly followed not really sure that I should even be there! "You like what you see Mr Irvine?" He gestured to the arena around us.  
  
"Yes sir."  
  
"Please call me Eric."  
  
"Ok S...Eric!" Chris grinned, his nerves subsiding, that was a good sign.  
  
"Well Mr Irvine..." Eric paused as his eyes fell upon me seemingly for the first time and I nervously looked at my feet. "And who might we have here?"  
  
"Oh I'm sorry erm, Eric, this is my...my erm Fiance!" Chris smiled and I glared at him. What the hell did he say that for?  
  
"Nice to meet you Mr Bischoff!" I held out my hand, trying not to look as nervous as I felt, "I'm Christina!"  
  
"Ah, Christopher and Christina!" Eric chuckled, "I like it!" he pointed at me & winked as he laughed. "Tell me are you part of the deal?"  
  
"I'm sorry I don't unde..."  
  
"No, erm she's not a wrestler, she's here for moral support!" Chris interrupted me.  
  
"Ah right." Eric smacked his lips together, "Shame!" he shrugged his shoulders as he looked me up and down, I didn't like it. "So, I guess we had better let you show me what you are made of young man!" He smiled as he patted Chris on the shoulder firmly. "You were developemntal with the WWF you say?"  
  
"Ah yes sir...Eric." Chris corrected himself.  
  
"And why did that fall through? Why are you here on my doorstep?"  
  
Chris took a deep breath, I held mine! "Because I ah didn't really like the direction the company was taking, I told Vince McMahon and he fired me si...Eric." He smiled nervously and I looked away incase the look on my face showed up his lies!  
  
"Ahh..." Eric raised his eyebrows approvingly, "Stuck it to old Vinnie Mac huh?" Chris noded, "I like the sound of that!" He stroked his chin, "So you want to get changed and we can get this thing started?"  
  
"Sure, where do I go?"  
  
"Back there!" Eric pointed.  
  
"Ok, won't be long!" Chris smiled. I made to follow him but Eric placed his hand on my shoulder.  
  
"You, my pretty young thing, can wait out here with me! I'm sure he can find his own way there and back!" Eric smiled, but I didn't like it. I looked to Chris for some sort of protest but how the hell could he protest? This guy had him by the balls. He just gave me an 'it'll be ok' look and left me there. "Come, have a seat." Eric smiled and led me to the side of the arena where we sat down side by side. "So tell me, how long have you two been engaged?"  
  
"Oh erm..not long." I smiled nervously.  
  
"Just I noticed, no ring!" he tapped my finger and I snatched my hand away a little too quickly.  
  
"Oh erm no, we're not exacatly financially stable enough to buy a ring just yet." I smiled trying to cover the fact that this guy gave me the holy creeps! I'd met people like him before in the business, traveling with my....with 'her' made it impossible to avoid such confrontations but, unlke 'her' I always found some way to get out of it without offending anyone or causing a scene, I guessed I just had to put up with his learing until Chris had his job, his dream, in the palm of his hand. 


	16. Part 16

Such Is Life  
  
Part 16  
  
Chris got changed in double quick time, he was back before Bischoff could slime his way even closer to me and I was thankful for that! I hoped Eric would pay as much attention to Chris in the ring as he had taken to my chest since we walked into the building.  
  
"Ok, can we have you in the ring please!" Eric smailed and stood up as Chris approached us. I smiled at him and mouthed 'good luck' as he turned his back to us and walked to the ring, followd by Eric. The guys that were already in the ring stepped out and eyed Chris suspiciously. Eric motioned one of them to get back in with him, a huge guy, I didn't like the look of the way things were shaping up at all. I sat back and watched as the three men in the ring talked over a few things, my mind racing, my stomach in knots, I was sure I was going to throw up. Eventually Eric jumped out of the ring and stood to one side. I focused on Chris, willing him to do good, willing him to kick this brute's ass but at the same time praying he didn't get hurt!  
  
They 'locked up' I didn't even know what that meant, back then I probably would have said 'They grabbed each other!' , but they started anyway and my heart pounded every time Chris was slammed onto he mat or thrown into the ropes. I watched intensly, not daring to look away, not daring to blink incase he was hurt. Was it always going to be like this? Every time he had a match would I be chewing my fingernails and wishing he was a Lawyer or a school teacher?  
  
It seemed to last forever, on and on he took the beatings and kept getting back up, eventually the guy lay on top of him and Eric counted as he slammed his hand to the mat 3 times. There was a slight applause throughout the gathering of guys, other wrestlers I presumed, even Eric clapped a few times but not very enthusiatically. To me, he'd been beaten, it didn't look good. I put my head in my hands and watched the goings on through my fingers, desperate for some sort of a conclusion to this, any sort even if it wasn't the one we were looking for. I just wanted to leave.  
  
Eric climbed back into the ring and helped Chris off the mat, pating his arm as he shook his hand, 'here it comes' I thought and held my breath. He climbed out and chris followed him, he glanced at me as they made their way to the back and I could have screamed! I wanted to know what was happening, I needed an answer! I ran a hand over my hair and noticed the huge guy that had wrestled with Chris comming my way. I thought I was in for another sleeze confrontation, I couldn't have been further from the truth!  
  
"Paul!" he smiled and held out his hand. I shook it, my hand looked like a child's in his, then again I was a child! I wasn't far past my 18th birthday but I felt so much older somehow.  
  
I smiled at this huge giant of a guy as he sat down beside me almost taking up 2 of the small chairs.  
  
"I'm Christina!" I said and looked away. I felt like I was staring but the sheer size of this guy was enough to bowl you over! When he sat beside me I felt like he could break me in half if he took mind to but I wasn't scared, just amazed! "I thought you were gonna kill him in there!" I laughed nervously and he smiled.  
  
"Your boyfriend?"  
  
"Yeah."  
  
"Ah no I've never killed anyone yet!" He laughed a deep hearty laugh and I had to join in when the thought crossed my mind that he would have made a great Father Christmas! I could almost picture him in the suit and beard, what the hell was I thinking? Chris was about to be told what his future held for him and I was playing 'dress up the giant'! I shook the thought from my head and turned back, trying not to stare at this guy.  
  
"So you been wrestling long?"  
  
"Nope not really, how about your boyfriend?"  
  
"Oh well..." I blushed, I didn't even know how long he'd been doing this! "I'm not altogether sure, over a year at least, he was developmental with the WWF!"  
  
"Ahhh right! That's what's given old Eric the hard on!"  
  
"Excuse me?" I eyed him, not really sure if I'd heard right.  
  
"It's an expression!" he laughed,"Look Eric is constantly trying to out do the McMahon's, he gets a little excited when someone mentions them, freaks out almost!" He laughed and shook his head, "Guy's gonna have a heart attack one of these days I swear!" he chuckled, such a weird thing to hear from such a huge bulking guy!  
  
"Oh right, I get you now!" I smiled feeling a little stupid. "So do you have a stage name?"  
  
"Giant!" He smiled & I laughed,  
  
"Fitting!" I nodded as I giggled and he shrugged as he chewed on his gum and smiled at me.  
  
"What about your man there?"  
  
"What?"  
  
"Does he have a stage name?"  
  
Once again, I didn't even know! man how little I knew about the guy I wanted to spend the rest of my life with! We had just avioded any mention of wrestling as far as we possibly could, I realised then how much talking about it must have hurt him. "Erm not as far as I know but he's full of surprises!" I looked nervously to the door where Bischoff had taken Chris, what was taking so long? Was he torturing him? Making him believe he was in with a chance only to say thanks but no thanks when it came to the crunch? I hoped not!  
  
"Well I think Eric was impressed I could tell by looking at him!"  
  
"Really?"  
  
"Yeah too right!"  
  
"I thought maybe because you beat him that..."  
  
There it was again, the chuckle! "No no no! I think it was because he let me beat him that Eric was impressed!"  
  
"I'm sorry I don't understand!"  
  
"Well see we get a lot of punks comming in here, begging to be let in, pleading for a try out, claiming to be the next Hulk Hogan, the next randy Savage, Shawn Michaels..." I swallowed hard at the mention of his name, I hadn't heard it said out loud for a long time. "What impressed Eric if you want my opinion is the fact that, first of all your man didn't come in here full of himself, he wasn't claiming to be the next anyone!"  
  
"That's Chris!" I smiled, feeling proud of him already!  
  
"Secondly they all wanna beat me or whoever Eric decides to put into the ring for their shot. They don't know when to quit, keep kicking out until they have got nothing left to fight with!" He smiled, 'Half of the punks we see in here are chain smoking auto mechanics that just wander in off the street! Chris has drive, ambition! I could see it in his eyes! I thought I was in trouble in there!" he laughed and I did too, I hoped he was right.   
  
I talked with Paul for a few minutes more, nervously glancing at the door now and then wishing I could have gone in there instead of sitting out here being tortured like this! Eventually Chris and Eric came out of the room, Eric shook his hand and closed the door, leaving Chris to walk back over to me on his own. I didn't give him the chance! I jumped up out of my seat and almost ran to him.  
  
"Well? What happened? What did he..."  
  
Chris lifted me up into his arms and spun me around as he shouted and laughed.  
  
"You did it?" I screamed as I found my feet on the floor once more.  
  
"No 'we' did it!" He smiled and kissed me passionately, taking me by surprise and then I blushed when I realised the amount of people that were watching us with eager eyes. I couldn't believe it, he'd done it, no matter what he said none of it was down to me at all! If it hadn't been for me he wouldn't have had to go through this anyway! I felt so proud of him,so excited and I just wanted to scream and shout!  
  
"Outside!" he said to me, his eyes sparkling, he obviously read my mind! 


	17. Part 17

Such Is Life  
  
Part 17  
  
He dragged me to the door of the arena and we ran out into the cold air of the morning and screamed! We jumped up and down and shouted and cheered, we must have looked like esacped lunatics but we didn't care one bit at the glances from the people passing us, none of them mattered. Chris had his job and we were going to start living again!  
  
He explained to me that Eric wanted him to start the following day and they would be moving on so we had to follow to the next town and he would pay for our hotel again that night! My head was spinning, I couldn't take it all in! Not only was he about to sign with WcW but he wasn't going to be developmental either, he was having 2 weeks to get back into the swing of things then he was going straight onto Nitro! It was unbelieveable! My Chris the superstar, I knew in my heart he was destined for it but nothing had prepared me for the feeling I had right then, I was so proud of him I didn't want to let him go when we got back to the car!  
  
We went to the hotel and, as instructed by Eric, waited in the lobby for him to get there with the newly drawn up contract. We only waited about an hour when he turned up. He took us into the restaurant and bought us lunch, we were starving and had to eat our food as though we had had breakfast when in actual fact we hadn't eaten much for the last week. It was torture, I wanted to stuff it into my mouth and ask for more but we managed to keep it together long enough to get the contract signed and get back to the room. He'd given Chris $500 advance, $500 was the most money I'd seen since Shawn put the wad of notes in my hand, we felt like millionaires! If I live to be a hundred I have to say that day will always be one of the best days of my life!  
  
Chris eyed the beer in his hand as though it was a gold plated bottle when room service arrived! I sat on the bed beside him as he drank it almost in one gulp. "Beer!" He smiled and I laughed.  
  
"Yeah! How totally awesome is this man?" I lay back on the bed, with my stomach full for the first time in months and a contented smile on my face. "You did it!" I giggled.  
  
"Yeah! Dig it!" Chris lay back beside me smiling. "Can you believe we are in a hotel room? A real hotel room and eating food and drinking Beer? Real god damn beer?" He laughed and rolled over on top of me! "Smell my breath!" he breathed on me and I wrinkled up my nose.  
  
"EEEW! DUDE!"  
  
"Yeah BEER man!" He kissed me and we both laughed again. "Do I smell like a drunk old man?" He smiled.  
  
"Yeah you smell like my ..." I stopped and got up off the bed.  
  
"What?"  
  
"Nothing! You stink of beer there are you happy now?" I smiled, "Drunk old man!" I shoved him playfully."And what is this about us being engaged by the way!?" I laughed, "I almost fell through the damn floor!"  
  
"Ah well yeah sorry about that! I just thought it would make me look more..."  
  
"Mature?" I raised my eyebrows.  
  
"Yeah I guess....and erm...it meant that I didn't have to actually 'ask' you!"  
  
"Ask me?"  
  
"Well I figured maybe when I get sorted we might be able to afford a ring and...."  
  
"Be still my beating heart was that a proposal?" I laughed and Chris blushed slightly.  
  
"Kinda, I mean if you want?"  
  
I bit on my lip and smiled, "You're serious?"  
  
"Damn serious!" He held me close to him as we stood in the middle of the room. "So," He cleared his throat, "Will you marry me? I mean eventually, well I mean.."  
  
I burst out laughing, "Yes! Yes Romeo I will, eventually!" I smiled and he kissed me.  
  
"For real?"  
  
"No I'm kidding!" I slapped his chest, "Of course for real you dork!"  
  
"Man this has been THE best day ever!" He laughed.  
  
"Yeah it has hasn't it?" I smiled, "Now, I'm gonna have another one of those deep bubble baths! You comming in with me again?"  
  
"Need you ask?" He jumped up and grabbed me around the waist as he carried me into the bathroom. As I ran the water he went back intothe bedroom and came back in with two bottles of beer which we opened as we soaked inthe tub. I'll never forget the words he said as we made a toast; "Here's to life and tomorrow we actually start living it!" How right he was. 


	18. Part 18

Such Is Life  
  
Part 18  
  
The next day was the start of our regular traveling routine. We hardly ever went on the coaches, instead opted to follow on in Chris' battered old car from town to town. His debut on Nitro was amazing! I stood out the back watching on a monitor in total amazement, there he was on every TV in the nation, my Chris, my clown, it was overwhelming & I had to fight back my tears! Before much longer he was a virtual household name - Chris Jericho! It wasn't long after his debut that I got the letter. It was strange to get any sort of communication at all, we weren't in one place long enough and we still didn't own anywhere we could call home, instead we just kept traveling. (Chris was praised throughout the company for the fact that he never missed a show whether he was working or not!) A stage hand came up to me one night and asked if I was Chris Jericho's wife, made me laugh as we weren't married although Chris had actually bought me the ring he promised! I took the letter anyway and studied it, the writing looked vaguely familliar but nothing came to mind. I was about to open it when Chris came past to tell me he was going out so I stuffed it into my pocket and went to watch his match.  
  
Later that night at the hotel I remembered about it and rumaged through my pockets while Chris took a shower. He was shouting from the bathroom, saying something that I didn't hear. I opened the letter and read it, read it again, staring at it, why did I care so much anyway?   
  
"I said do you want to get room....what's wrong?" He came out of the bathroom and sat beside me on the bed. "Hun?" He touched my arm and I passed him the letter, I couldn't speak. He read it and put his arm around my shoulders, "I'm sorry babe." He said quietly, "You ok?"  
  
"I don't really know to be honest." I stood up and went to the window with the letter in my hands and read it again. It was from Shawn. My mother had died 4 weeks after we'd 'ran away', he was sorry, he couldn't contact me, he saw Chris on TV and sent this hoping I'd get it. My head spun. I shouldn't even give a crap but I felt sad, confused, it just didn't feel right that my mother was dead even if I hadn't seen her in so long. I guess I just wasn't prepared for it, I was stunned. She'd died in her sleep, with Shawn beside her, man pitty that guy waking up with a corpse in his bed. She'd taken an overdose and Shawn was sorry he hadn't even realised. How should he? She was always out of it, it could have happened at any time, even when I was there I wouldn't have known, I would have just pulled the sheet over her and left her there feeling disgusted, hating her like I always did. She had to drive the knife in one more time though, when I was happy, when things were working out, typcal of my mother the loser. I felt like I should go to Shawn, find out more but what would be the point? It had happened so long ago now, no one would care any more, well no one but Shawn who obviously cared enough to try to find me even after she'd been dead for months. My mind was racing with a thousand questions, did my father know? Where was she burried? Did he come over and get her or did he just not care anymore either? What about my Aunt in Texas? What about my Grandfather back home in England? All these things I thought about and got answers to none of them. I put a hand to my head as I felt tears sting my eyes, I shouldn't cry for her dammit! She was a fuck up! She almost made me a fuck up! She didn't deserve my tears! I fought them back but as soon as I felt Chris put his arms around me from behind I couldn't help but let them fall. I lay my head back onto his shoulder and cried for a long time. 


	19. Part 19

Such Is Life   
  
Part 19  
  
All I could manage to bring myself to do was make a phone call to Shawn. I thanked him for getting in touch with us, he asked how I was doing, I said I was fine, blah blah blah and I didn't ask him any of the questions I wanted answers to. I don't know why I didn't ask, I guess hearing his voice after so long was a little overwhelming & to him this was an event that had happened a long time ago now, to me it was like she had died that same day, it hurt too much although I couldn't admit it to myself at the time.  
  
I went on! We got up, we did shows, we slept in hotel rooms. We were warm and fed and had money, I couldn't ask for much more than that. I was happy, Chris was happy and life was good. My mother and the letter from Shawn gradually faded into the past, just another event that I dealt with, lived with, just like when my parents divorced, like when my mother dragged me half way around the world, and now this. Just another notch in my history.  
  
I got a job with WcW! Someone once asked me if I was any good with a camera and I refused to even touch one! History had a bad habit of repeating its self in my family & I was going to put a stop to that, instead I got a job in the costume department. We had two pay cheques comming in and decided we would look for a base, somewhere to go when we weren't working, somewhere to call home. It felt strange looking through real estate windows and knowing we could afford some of these places! I felt guilty, an irrational feeling I know but it was there all the same! We went to Florida, ok so we couldn't exactly afford the mansion with the pool but we got an appartment and somehow managed to get back there at least once a week, even if it was only for one night! It was awesome! Our home, I was bowled over every time I turned the key in the lock!  
  
We lay in bed one night, at home, curled up together when he asked me.  
  
"So when are we getting married?"  
  
I smiled, "Ever the charmer!" I kissed his cheek, he'd been the same since the first day I'd met him, blunt, straight to the point no sugar coating anything! Sometimes it wasn't a great thing but most of the time I loved him for it!  
  
"Well?" He shuffled and turned to look at me and smiled as he touched my cheek.  
  
"You really wanna get married?"  
  
"Hell yeah! We have money, we have a home...perfect!" he grinned.  
  
"Ok well then I will leave it up to you! I don't mind!"  
  
"How about right now?"  
  
"In the middle of the night? Are you crazy? Ok Don't answer that!"  
  
He reached over to the side table and produced a piece of paper, a marriage license. My jaw dropped, "Now we just need someone to do the formalities!"  
  
"It's 2am!"  
  
"So? Hey this is America! We can get this done trust me!"  
  
"You are crazy!" I Said as I stared at him jumping out of the bed butt naked and hopping into his jeans.  
  
"Come on! Lets just do it!" He came over to my side of the bed and knelt down and kissed me pasionately.  
  
"You are a nutter! A total fucking maniac!" I said shaking my head.  
  
"That's why you love me now get dressed before I change my mind!"  
  
"Oooh ooh hoho! You are gonna change your mind?" I said laughing as I got out of bed.  
  
"You never know I might get a better offer!" He said swaggering.  
  
"Maybe I got a better offer already? Maybe Billy Kidman has a mansion and a Rolls Royce!"  
  
Chris cracked up laughing, "Yeah and maybe Torrie has a thing for blonde Canadians we can just do a swap!" He grabbed me around the waist and held me. "You wanna do it or not?"  
  
"Hell yeah! Come on!" I ran into the bathroom and got dressed. I'd done some weird assed crazy shit in my life but that night totally topped the lot and if I had to do it all again I wouldn't do it any other way! We found a crappy chappel with a drunken 'minister' and we did it! It was perfect, just me and him, the same way it had been for so long. It was the week before my 19th birthday when I became Mrs Irvine. Go figure! 


	20. Part 20

Such Is Life  
  
Part 20  
  
Everyone was shocked when they found out what we'd done. It made me laugh whenever I told someone and saw the expression on their face, well I suppose it was a pretty crazy thing to do but Chris was the love of my life and now because he was crazy, because 'we' were crazy he was now my husband as well! I remember standing watching the monitor the night after we'd gone to the chapel, watching the countdown on the Titan Tron and waiting for him to come out, there he was, my husband! I had to stop myself giggling out loud but it still sounded weird, unreal somehow. I loved to watch him when he was at work, he made me appreciate the business a lot more and I realised that people did get hurt and it wasn't just sweaty old men wearing Lycra that did this stuff! Hell I would not have married a sweaty old man! I wondered what my old friends would think of me now, wondered if they would laugh at me if I told them I married a wrestler! Maybe I would call them one day & tell them, listen as they tell me how they married a brick layer or a garbage man, then who would be the one laughing?!  
  
I pretty much loved my life at that point, everything seemed to be getting better and better and Chris was hot property. We stayed in the best hotels, rode around in limo's got a decent wage every month and we were happy. I loved my job, even though it was basically sewing up tears or stitching on tassels, it gave me something to do and it made me feel like I was contributing in some way instead of just hanging around out back like some kind of groupie while my husband did all the work and brought the money home! There were some wives/girlfriends that didn't do shit! I used to see them backstage, flirting with all the guys when their man's back was turned, having said that it worked both ways, some of the guys were terrible. Different girl in every city then had the nerve to take their laundry home on weekends for their wives to do! It sickened me, I was glad Chris wasn't like that! Oh he had his run ins with the female fans, some of which I saw others I was told about by him, every time whether I was there or not I knew he could handle it and I knew he loved me and wouldn't cheat on me. At least that's what I hoped. I saw how the fans and the pressure destroyed so many relationships around us, still me and Chris were as happy as ever, made me wonder though if this was too good to be true, if he was too good to be true?  
  
Things started to change when he was offered the job with the WWF. I didn't want to go back there, too many bad memories too many old faces that haunted my dreams still. He wanted to go, it was a pay rise and Vince McMahon was hot for him, throwing all sorts of bonuses to try to tempt him away from Eric and WcW. We didn't argue at first, the discussions got a little heated granted but they weren't arguments exactly. I wanted to stay where we were and carry on with my job, selfish maybe now that I think back. Hundreds of guys would have loved to have been in Chris' position with Vince eating out of the palm of their hands, it was a step up for him I knew that but still in my heart I just thought it would be the end of us. I guess I believed the WWF was a jinx all because of my mother and her ill-fated demise, it scared me I don't know why I felt the way I did I couldn't help it.   
  
Anyway Chris went to WWF, we didn't see much of each other, other than when we were at home but the nature of the business meant that didn't happen very often, most of the time he was traveling, we were at opposite ends of the country and it killed me. I missed him so much, missed what we used to have, I felt like I couldn't stop this whole thing from fading away and I was terrified. I considered going to the WWF on more than one occasion, hell basically every night as I lay awake and alone in a bunk somewhere but pride or fear or both maybe I don't know, somehow always won out and stopped me from making that jump.  
  
When we did get home at the same time we were both tired and irritable, he would snap at me for stupid things like me asking him what time it was and I wasn't much better. I hated it, we sounded like my parents I never thought that would happen to us but there we were anyway. He had changed, I had changed, I guessed we were just kids when we met, kids when we got married, kids with stupid unrealistic ideals of what a marriage would be like. Now we were both sad because we were losing it and neither one of us could stop that, we tried and we failed over and over again and it was so frustrating because I still loved him more than life its self but no matter what we did it just wasn't going to work. Neither of us wanted to admit that for a very long time. 


	21. Part 21

Such is Life  
  
Part 21  
  
The night we eventually decided to call it quits broke my heart. We were both home, both exhausted and after another argument over something so trivial I don't even remember I broke down and sobbed. He sat next to me on the couch and I'll never forget the words he said, the words neither of us had wanted to mention for so long but were both thinking all the same. "This isn't working!"  
  
I was so choked I couldn't speak but I knew in my heart he was right. He sat beside me with his head in his hands, sniffing occasionally until I could eventually stop crying for long enough to speak.  
  
"I'll ah…I'll move out."  
  
"No I don't want that. I'll go!"  
  
"I can't afford this place on my own Chris." I wiped my face.  
  
"You don't have to, I'll pay, I'll make sure you're ok."  
  
"But I still love you!" I broke down again and he held me and cried. We cried most of the night but we still slept in the same bed, holding onto each other, knowing it was the last time. Not that either of us got much sleep, I just lay there as he held me, devastated that we had finally admitted the truth, it was over.  
  
I suppose word got around both locker rooms, I got sympathy looks from all the guys that I worked with, some had that look in their eye like 'What did you expect?' I ignored them. What I had with Chris had been the best years of my life and now at 21 years old I had to rebuild it, move on, but damn it was the hardest thing I've ever done. I couldn't help but turn on the TV when I knew Raw was on, even though just seeing him on the screen made me cry I still needed to see him.  
  
I was home for the weekend the day Shawn Michaels walked back into my life totally unexpected. There was a knock on the door and there he was. I was stunned, then he held out his arms and I cried on the doorstep. He had heard what had happened, even though as he explained to me he wasn't wrestling anymore due to an injury, he still worked for the WWF and he wanted to see me, make sure I was ok, ever the 'uncle'! It was amazing to see him again, we talked for hours, I even got up the courage to ask him all those questions about my mother that I had avoided so long ago now. He stayed, slept on the couch and the next day we did the same, talked and talked, it was exactly what I needed right then, someone to talk to, I had felt so alone since Chris left, like I had no one, now I had Shawn, I was sad the next day when he left.  
  
The inevitable happened and Vince McMahon and the WWF bought out WcW, most of us were left jobless, the irony of it still stings me to this day, if it wasn't so tragic I'd have laughed out loud. The last Nitro was sad, everyone was saying their goodbyes and there was a lot of tears and confusion. Not many people had a clue what to do or where to go next, wrestlers as well as us backstage hands.  
  
I got another job in a local school, Shawn still came to see me, I still cried over Raw every Monday night and wondered how the hell I had come to this? This meaningless lonely life that I was living, hardly seemed worth getting out of bed every morning, in fact there were a few occasions when I just didn't bother at all. The job at the school eventually ended and I was lost, I sat all day watching crappy soaps on TV, not even getting dressed. It took Shawn to shake some sense into me and get me back on track, and to this day I will never ever forget that, without him I wouldn't be where I am today, where IS that you ask? Well keep reading it aint all bad! 


	22. Part 22

Such is Life  
  
Part 22  
  
As I mentioned Shawn was acting guardian angel over me and at the time I wished he would just go away and leave me to rot, but he didn't. He turned up day after day, made me get dressed, took me out for lunch or even just for a walk, something to get me out of that god forsaken appartment with all it's memories of happier times. He did it on a daily basis for over a month, then one day he turned up as usual and handed me a piece of paper.  
  
"What's this?"  
  
"Read it!"  
  
It was a job advertisment, for the now re-named WWE! I looked it over but as soon as I saw the logo on the header I wasn't interested. I gave it back to him.  
  
"Well?"  
  
"Well what?"  
  
"You gonna apply for it?"  
  
"Are you crazy?"  
  
"Yes, next question!" He smiled and sat beside me.  
  
"Why are you even bothering?"  
  
"Because I care." He smiled.  
  
"Why do you care?"  
  
"Why do you ask so many stupid questions?"  
  
"Because I love hearing your stupid assed answers!"  
  
He laughed and shook his head and I smiled. "See you can do it?"  
  
"What?"  
  
"Smile!" he touched my chin. "It helps you know? Releases all those good hormones into your system."  
  
"Yeah well thank you Jenny Jones but I don't have a lot to be happy about these days!" I sighed.  
  
"But you could have, you could have a job doing what you love to do!" He raised his eyebrows.  
  
"And run into Chris every damn day?"  
  
"Read it again!" He sighed. I did as he asked.  
  
"Oh I see now."  
  
"Smackdown, you would be working with Smackdown!"  
  
"What if I cant do it anymore? Its been so long and theres so many more people to deal with at the WWF..."  
  
"E! And yes you can now come on we'll go and see about it!"  
  
"Right now?"  
  
"Yeah!" He smiled, 'Right now, get dressed before I have to kick your ass!"  
  
I laughed and did as he asked. My heart was racing when we pulled up outside the huge overbaring office building with my ressume clutched to my chest. We walked in and were told to wait until someone could see us but Shawn smiled at the receptionist and told her to go and get someone right then because 'Shawn Michaels was in the building!'  
  
I was amazed, I stared at him, "You really are an egomaniac!"  
  
"When I have to be, it helps having a name to use!" he smiled.  
  
Soon after we were lead into another office and I was interviewed.  
  
1 week later I got a phone call asking me if I could start the following day and could I be in Texas by noon. The first thing that crossed my mind was No! No I cant be in Texas, no I cant work for the WW'E', no I cant do this. What came out of my mouth was yes sir, yes sir, yes sir.   
  
So there I was again, packing my bags, emptying my fridge and setting off for a new/old life on the road. 


	23. Part 23

Such is Life  
  
Part 23  
  
I was nervous for the first couple of days but eventually I got used to the hustle and bustle of the business again. I didn't know anyone, kept myself to myself and I liked it that way, it meant no one knew who I was either. No one knew I was Chris Jericho's wife,(Yes we were still married! Neither one of us had the heart or the stomach to start divorce proceedings it was all just too fresh, too painful.)So I was able to just do my work and no one gave me the sympathetic looks or tried to be my friend because of who I knew rather than who I was.  
  
It was a few weeks before I started to remember the names of the wrestlers that came and went with their torn shirts or ripped pants, but I was getting the hang of it. One particular guy was always cheerful and friendly, his name was Matt Hardy. He always had a smile for me or a joke to tell me as I passed him in the corridor. He was a nice guy, but he wasn't Chris. So when he asked me out I politely refused. A few weeks later I heard he was dating another wrestler by the name of Amy Dumas, Shame really but I wasn't ready to be going out on dates with anyone, I didn't know that I ever would be ready. Still Matt remained a friend & that I was greatful for on the long road trips between venues. I made other friends eventually and Shawn stopped by sometimes, he was back to working as a wrestler but they put him on Raw, I guess I was hoping he'd be on Smackdown but I still got to see him once in a while and we always had fun and I was glad he bothered to keep in touch with me after my mother treated him like a pile of shit! Most guys wouldn't have bothered but I believe I've said it before, Shawn was that kind of a guy, he cared, whether he wanted to or not I don't think he could help it!  
  
So I went on, did my job, slept on the coach, even went out a couple of times with some people that I worked with. I was starting to live again, smile again, it had been a long time comming but I still felt the emptiness on a night when I was alone in bed and when I went home it was even worse. I barely went back there at all.  
  
When I took the job I didn't think about the pay per views, the JOINT pay per views! When we had one comming up I still didn't think about the fact that the Raw rosta would be in attendance as well as the usual guys that I worked with. It wasn't until Shawn said something on the phone the night before the show that the penny dropped and I felt sick to my stomach with nerves. All he said was "See you tomorrw night!" I could have ran away. I almost did! I chewed on my nails all night staring out of the hotel window, not really sure what to do. In the end I called in sick. I wanted to see him so badly but I didn't know what he was doing with his life by then, maybe he had another girlfriend? Maybe he didn't feel the need to see me the way I yearned for the slightest glimpse of him? I didn't want to take the chance of being kicked right back down to square one again just when things were getting a little easier to deal with. So I stayed in bed and for the first time in a few weeks I cried most of the day knowing he was so near by and yet I was unable to go to him, hold him, I couldn't even see him.  
  
After the show was over Shawn turned up at the hotel room door. I rolled my eyes and let him in.  
  
"They said you were sick?"  
  
"I am." I lied and he felt my forehead for a temperature. "Don't fuss I'll live."  
  
"Are you sure that's all it is?"  
  
"It's probably a 24 hour thing. I'll be fine in the morning."  
  
"Well I see you managed to put some clothes on at least."  
  
"Yeah look I'm really tired Shawn can we do this shit another time?"  
  
"What shit?"  
  
"This over protective crap that you pull with me for God knows what reason! I can not deal with it tonight ok?" I snapped, I hadn't meant to. Shawn pursed his lips, nodded his head and stood up.  
  
"Ok, guess I know where we stand then huh?"  
  
"Shawn I didn't mean it."I sighed and sat down with my head in my hands. "Don't go ok? I'm sorry."  
  
He sighed and sat down next to me, "You didn't want to see him did you?"  
  
"The problem was I did want to see him but I just can't do it. It's too hard."  
  
"I can understand that."  
  
"Is he..." I paused, "Is he happy?"  
  
"I think he's doing ok." Shawn smiled, "But I don't know him all that well, maybe you should ask him yourself?"  
  
"Yeah right! Just turn up to Raw one night and say Hey Chris how's it goin? Fucking anyone? Not that I care or anything I just want to make sure you're happy!" I said sarcastically.  
  
"You could just go down the hall and knock on his door."  
  
I froze. He was down the hall, all this time he was just a few feet away from me. I couldn't believe it! "I can't just go and knock on his door."  
  
"Why not?"  
  
"Because I can't." I whispered and stood up. He followed me to the window, standing behind me as I stared out over another nameless city.  
  
"Wouldn't you rather know one way or the other?"  
  
"Yes, no...I don't know!" I leaned my head against the cold glass of the window pane and felt Shawn move closer behind me until he put his arms around my waist.  
  
"I would rather know if it was me." He said into my ear and I leaned my head back on his shoulder, I always felt comfortable with him even though he was older than me. His hug tightened and he rocked me slightly.  
  
"I love him so much I couldn't bare it if he didn't still have some sort of feelings for me, I'd rather not know, live in hope!" I said quietly, "But thankyou."  
  
"What have I done?" I could see Shawn's reflection in the window as he smiled over my shoulder.  
  
"You have no idea!"I laughed slightly.  
  
"So tell me?"  
  
I turned around and faced him, "When I was....look I...I ah.....you've been there for me a lot over the past couple of months that'sall."  
  
"NO you were going to say something? When you were what?"  
  
I blushed and walked to the mini bar. "Drink?"  
  
"Sure."  
  
We got a bottle of beer each and sat on the sofa. "So?"  
  
"It's nothing! Stupid! Ignore me!"  
  
I managed to avoid the subject most of the night as we drank and drank our way through the mini bar but I had wanted to tell him about when I was 15, when I thought I loved him, how seeing him with my mother was the worst thing that could have happened and then through all of it it was him that was here for me still, not my mother, not who it should have been. It was weird how things turned out yet here he was anyway and my husband was but a few doors away and I couldn't even go and see him. 


	24. Part 24

Such Is Life  
  
Part 24  
  
It was late when Shawn went back to his own room,or should that be early? Anyway I found myself alone again, it was still so hard to get used to getting into bed and turning out the light knowing you were going to wake up the same way in the morning, on your own! I didn't think I'd ever get used to it as long as I lived. I climbed into bed and turned the lamp off, feeling slightly light headed from all the alcohol but it hadn't numbed me enough to stop me crying again.  
  
The next morning I felt like shit. I threw my stuff into my bag and ran a comb through my hair. I didnt bother to put make up on, I didn't have the energy after the previous night. I just grabbed a jacket and my bag and left. As I walked along the corridor towards the elevator I wondered which of those doors he was behind. Was he still asleep? Was he alone? I shook my head and pressed the button for the elevator, I had to get over this somehow, it was just eating me up inside every damn minute of the day! I started to wish I had never taken that job in the first place! I Should have known I would have to bump into him one day.  
  
I was shaken from my thoughts when the elevator door started to open. I reached down to grab my bag off the floor where I'd dumped it when I was waiting. A few guys barged out of the elevator, laughing and clowning around and knocked me on my ass as I was picking it up. I winced and muttered something under my breath.  
  
"I'm sorry I didn't.." I froze at the sound of the voice, his voice. The guys laughter subsided and they started to walk away leaving Chris with me in the hall. "Oh, hi."  
  
I scrambled to my feet still not having the courage to look into his eyes, my heart pounded, I didn't want him to see how scared I was.  
  
"Hi." I cleared my throat.  
  
"How are you?" He said quietly.  
  
"I'm erm..ok ya know." I shrugged.  
  
"That's good."  
  
I eventualy l looked up and saw he was looking at his feet instead of directly at me.  
  
"I better go." I started for the elevator and the doors closed before I got to them. "Bastard!" I whispered and bit my lip not even sure if he was still behind me.  
  
"That always happens." He said and I turned slowly to see him smiling at me. My stomach lurched.  
  
"Yeah, typical huh." I shuffled my feet,  
  
"I ah.....I Guess I'll see you around then."  
  
"Yeah." I forced a smile and waited for him to turn and walk away, but he stood there, looking into my eyes, only 2 feet away from me. I just wanted him to hold me, I wanted to feel his lips on mine again, but at the same time I felt like running as fast as I could away from there! The doors opened again behind me as we faced each other and I couldn't tear my eyes away from his at first. I felt frozen to the spot. "Well..."I cleared my throat again, "I ah..." I gestured to the doors.  
  
"Sure." He nodded and smiled slightly, "Good to see ya again."  
  
"You too." He turned and starterd to walk away.  
  
"Chris!" I Shouted and he stopped and turned around, "I ah....well.....take care yeah?"  
  
"You too." He smiled and walked away as I stepped into the elevator trying to hold it together enough to at least make it to the parking lot away from everyone. But I couldn't. By the time I reached the ground floor my tears were flooding out. The doors opened and I quickly tried to wipe my face and look natural as I hurried through the lobby and out into the parking lot. I ran straight into someone and hit out.  
  
"Hey hey!"  
  
"Get off me you fucking idiot!" I screamed as my tears fell and I struggled to get out of this guys grip.  
  
"Hey calm down ok lady! Jesus!"  
  
I took a deep breath and stopped fighting.  
  
"You were the one ran into me ok?"  
  
"I'm....I'm sorry I..I..." I couldn't speak as my tears fell again.  
  
"HEY!" A voice shouted and both me and the guy spun around, "WHAT THE FUCK YOU DOIN CENA?"  
  
"Woah! Hang on a minute dude I was doing nothing!" The guy held his arms up and started to walk away from me.  
  
"Get your fucking hands off her man!" Chris pushed the guy backwards.  
  
"I didn't fucking touch her man! What the fuck has gotten into everyone today? Its like the fucking twilight zone round here!"  
  
"Chris he didn't I mean I ran into him that's all!" I wiped my face and sniffed and Chris looked from me to this 'Cena' guy.  
  
"Sure?"  
  
"Yes honestly, it was all my fault! I wasn' t looking where I was going!"  
  
Cena screwed his face up, shook his head and walked away muttering to himself. Chris hung his head.  
  
"I'm sorry I ah....well I ran down the stairs!" He smiled. "I just..." He sighed and put his hamds on his hips "I know it's crazy but have you got time for a coffee or something?"  
  
I couldn't believe what I was hearing, "Oh erm... ' My mouth opened and closed like some sort of a idiot!  
  
"I mean you don't have to I just thought maybe..."  
  
"No I mean yes I....." I took a deep breath, "I would like to go and get a coffee with you!"I forced a smile although it felt like my stomach was about to leap up out of my throat. What the hell was going on here? Cena was right, maybe it was the Twilight Zone? 


	25. Part 25

Such Is Life  
  
Part 25  
  
Walking to the cafe felt like the longest walk of my life. I just didn't know what to expect, why was he doing this anyway? Maybe he was going to do the 'Let's just be friends' speach, or tell me that he had someone else, maybe he wanted a divorce even? My mind was spinning and I was terrified. We got to the cafe and Chris told me to get a seat while he got the coffee's, more torture, more waiting, I felt like my heart was going to stop, either that or I was going to puke on my shoes! eventually he came back with 2 cups and sat opposite me, I looked everywhere to avoid his gaze & I didn't even want the damn coffee anyway!  
  
"So, how have you been?" He asked after a minute or two sitting in silence.  
  
"Oh yeah fine, thanks! Um....you?"  
  
"Yeah pretty good!"  
  
"That's good." I looked down at my hands, what the hell was happening? Was he doing this just to make me suffer even more?  
  
"You keeping up with Raw?"  
  
"Not really." I smiled nervously and took a sip from my cup, it was hot, too hot, I bit on my lip.  
  
"I ah......" He paused and I held my breath, this was it one way or another. He cleared his throat, 'I mean have you....well...are you seeing anyone?"  
  
I almost laughed out loud! I looked up at him for the first time, he was looking at his cup. "Erm no I'm not." I took a deep breath, "Why? Are you?"  
  
He shook his head and lifted his cup to his mouth, "Son of a bitch!" he wiped his lip, obviously finding out like I did that the coffee was too hot! I bit my lip to stop smiling as he mumbled to himself. Again we sat there in silence for a few minutes watching everyone comming and going, all with lives to live, I felt like mine was on hold right then. "So you liking your job?"  
  
"Yeah it's ok." I said quietly. Damn why did it have to be this hard? This was the guy I shared my life with for so long yet we were finding it hard to put a sentance together, it hurt.  
  
"I never really thought I'd see you again ya know?" He smiled.  
  
"Yeah I guess you don't need to go to court to get a divorce these days huh?" I hadn't meant to sound so harsh but my head was spinning, I wished he would just tell me what it was that was on his mind before I screamed! He bit his lip and looked down into his cup.  
  
"That's what you want? A divorce?"  
  
"Do you?"  
  
"I asked you first!"  
  
"Is this a game to you Chris?" I raised my voice slightly.  
  
"What? You're the one sitting here spouting off about getting a divorce!"  
  
"Spouting off huh? Great!" I sat back in my chair and sighed.  
  
"So do you want a divorce?"  
  
"Well what's the point of us being married anymore? Seriously I mean we're not together, we barely speak.." I stopped, what the hell was comming out of my mouth? The last thing I wanted was a divorce yet I couldn't seem to stop myself!  
  
"Ok, keep your fucking hair on! If you want a divorce we'll get a divorce!" He said through gritted teeth and ran a hand through his hair.  
  
"I didn't say I wanted a divorce! Jesus we can't even have a civil cup of coffee!"  
  
"We could if you weren't such a heartless bitch!"  
  
"Classy! Real smart!" I smiled sarcastically, it was happening all over again and we'd barely been in the same room for more than 15 minutes! I stood up and grabbed my purse, "I'll see you around Chris! Have a nice life!" I left with tears stinging my eyes. I still had those stupid little girl ideals that everything would work out like the movies some how, only if this was a movie it would have bombed! 


	26. Part 26

Such is Life   
  
Part 26  
  
I went outside trying to hold it together, I'd done enough crying and I felt like it was time I toughened up! I went back to the hotel and back to my room as I had luckily forgotten to hand in my key on my way out the first time. I was in there 5 minutes just staring into space when someone barged in. I jumped off the end of the bed.  
  
"What the fuck?"  
  
"And do you know something really funny?" Chris pointed at me with fire in his eyes.  
  
"Get out of my room!" I yelled.  
  
"I asked you for coffee because I wanted to tell you I missed you and....HA! I'm such a fucking idiot!" He ran a hand through his hair.  
  
"YEAH WELL YOU GOT THAT RIGHT NOW GET THE HELL OUT OF MY ROOM!" I went to the door and pulled it open but he just glared at me.  
  
"All this time you wanted a divorce huh? So come on who is it?"  
  
"Excuse me?"  
  
"Who are you seeing?"  
  
"I'm not seeing anyone! Please Chris just leave!" I begged him as tears welled up in my eyes again.  
  
"I bet it's some little fucking punk like....like Spanky or...or Cena yeah that would make sense after what I saw today in the parking lot!"  
  
"I am NOT Seeing anyone!"  
  
"Yeah right!"  
  
He turned his back on me as I started to cry, "I'm not seeing anyone I'm telling you the truth!"  
  
"So why do you want a divorce?" He turned back to me.  
  
"I never said I wanted a fucking divorce! I thought that's why you took me for coffee!"  
  
"You were talking about a divorce!" Chris raised his eyebrows, "I was there I heard you SAY IT!"  
  
"For god's sake Chris!" I slammed the door closed just for something to bang, I wanted to throw something at his head, make him listen to me! "YOU'RE SAYING YOU DONT WANT A DIVORCE?"  
  
"DAMN RIGHT!" He shouted.  
  
"YOU WANT US TO STAY MARRIED?"  
  
"YES I DO!" He yelled in my face.  
  
"WHY? WHAT'S THE FUCKING POINT CHRIS HUH?" Tears streamed down my face. "WHAT THE HELL IS THE POINT OF US STAYING MARRIED WHEN...." I couldn't finish my sentance. He slammed me up against the wall and kissed me hard. I grabbed hold of him and pulled on his hair as I kissed him back, we were almost swallowing each other. He walked backwards pulling me with him as we kissed and slammed his back off the mini bar, I heard bottles crashing inside. He turned me around and pushed me up against the wall again and I knocked a picture frame onto the floor and it smashed, all the time we didn't break the intense kiss. I moved him backwards again and we fell over the small couch, tipping it as I landed on top of him, it was only then we stopped kissing and looked at each other. I swallowed hard, not really sure of what was going to happen next, then he smiled at me as he brushed some hair from my face, "I missed you." He said almost breathlessly. I just stared, was he serious?  
  
"I ah..." I gasped, trying to get some air back into my lungs, he kissed me again as he slid his back onto the floor, it was like something took over me, I just wanted him, I stopped caring about what was going to happen afterwards, I wanted him and I had him, there and then, on the floor of the hotel room. 


	27. Part 27

Such Is Life   
  
Part 27  
  
I couldn't believe what had just happened! We stared at each other, breathless, sweaty, it was surreal.  
  
"I'm....I'm sorry I ah..."  
  
"Shhh.." he kissed me then held my head to his chest as he stroked my hair, "It's ok."  
  
"Is it?"  
  
"Well if we can do that every time we argue then..."  
  
"Yeah right! You'd be too knackered to go to work!" I smiled and he laughed.  
  
"What are we gonna do then?"  
  
"I don't know." I sighed and looked up at him.  
  
"You wanna erm...try going for a coffee again?" he smiled.  
  
"I never stopped loving you Chris! I just don't know what happened to us."  
  
"Hey I feel the same." He pulled me close and kissed the top of my head, "I guess we have some things to talk about huh?"  
  
"I guess so."  
  
We got dressed and went for coffee, it was a lot better than the first attempt but we didn't get much of a chance to talk with people comming over and patting him on the back for a great match at the pay per view and a couple of autograph hunters. Some of the crew came in and told me it weas time to go so we walked outside.  
  
"So." I sighed, "I guess I have to get going then."  
  
"You ah...want me to call you or.."  
  
"Yeah that'd be good." I smiled.  
  
"When will I see you?"  
  
"I have no idea. When's the next joint pay per view?" I laughed.  
  
"I can't wait that long!" he looked at his feet.  
  
"Chrissy come on we're going!" Someone shouted. I turned and looked at him.  
  
"Just call me we'll sort something out ok?"  
  
"OK." he smiled and touched my arm.  
  
"I better erm..." he leaned in and kissed my lips softly at first but it grew into something more passionate and I didn't want to stop. There were some whistles and laughter comming from the crew and I didn't give a crap. I was some where to getting my husband back they could all go to hell as far as I was concerned. When we eventually did part we looked at each other for a while and he touched my cheek.  
  
"I'll see ya then yeah?"  
  
"Hope so!" I smiled and stood on my tip toes to kiss his cheek then went to get on the coach, onto the next town. My head was spinning and I felt happier than I had done in a long time. I loved him so much, I just prayed it was enough to keep us together this time. 


	28. Part 28

Such Is Life  
  
Part 28  
  
I sat down on the coach in a world of my own as it pulled out of the hotel parking lot. I felt happy and apprehensive all at the same time. I knew if we were going to get back together it wasn't going to be as easy as a quick screw every time we argued!  
  
"Hey mind if I sit?" I jumped and looked up to see Jon Cena standing above me.  
  
"Since when did the 'tallent' ride with us mere mortals?"I said sarcastically.  
  
"Since one of our coaches broke down!" He grinned and slid into the seat beside me and I laughed and shook my head.  
  
"How blessed are we to have you guys among us?!" I laughed.  
  
"Not that many, just me and Matt and Shan...oh you were being sarcastic! I get it now!" He said and winked. "Listen I just wanted to say sorry about before I didn't realise you were Chris' wife man!"  
  
"That's ok we're separated anyway."  
  
"You are?" I nodded, "Girl you can be separated from me any time!"  
  
"Huh?"  
  
"Well if that's separated then..."  
  
"Oh right!" I laughed, "Well that was....I dunno what it was to be honest." I shrugged.  
  
"Looked like a make up kiss to me!" He smiled.  
  
"Something, maybe!"  
  
"A confused make up kiss then!" he laughed.  
  
My cell rang and I shuffled down the seat so I could get it out of my pocket.  
  
"Hello?"  
  
"Hi I hope you don't mind me calling so soon!"  
  
My face must have lit up because Jon whispered 'see ya' and left me alone as I curled up on the seat and listened to Chris. We talked for an hour about just about everything and anything. It was nice, no arguments and it gave me some hope that some how we could get back something of what we used to have before.  
  
That continued every day for 2 weeks. He called me, I called him, we talked, we even laughed sometimes, then came the day we were meeting up. Raw and Smackdown were close by, same state, so Chris and I arranged to meet and I was nervous as hell. It was like a first date, not meeting up with my husband! I walked into the hotel feeling warn out after traveling half the night and half the day. I went to my room, hoping I would have time to at least get a shower and a change of clothes before he called me. I went into the shower turned the radio right up and sang along with REM at the top of my voice. When I came out there was a bunch of flowers on the bed. I scanned the room quickly before picking up the little note. I laughed when I read it, it made me feel a little less nervous about the whole 'meeting up thing'!  
  
"You still can NOT sing! Didn't wanna disturb you! See you in an hour in the restaurant or call me!  
  
Chris xx  
  
P.s. Lock your door once in a while you dont know what freaks are lurking around!"  
  
I shook my head and laughed, always the clown! 


	29. Part 29

Such Is Life  
  
Part 29  
  
I remember the feelings I had as I got ready to go downstairs and meet him. I felt a sick kind of excitement,my head was spining and my heart pounded. I walked into the restaurant and I saw him stand up. He was wearing tight black jeans and a white tshirt that fitted snugly over his muscly arms. His hair was tied back rom his face, just a few strands hung lose around his cheeks. he smiled as I walked towards the table.  
  
"Hi!" He kissed my cheek and I sat down and smiled. To my relief he looked as nervous as I did. "You want something to eat or.."  
  
"No thanks, I'll just have a coffee." I fiddled with my hands clasped together on the table, barely even able to look at him. The waiter came over and he ordered 2 coffee's and we sat in silence for a few minutes. I just wanted to get up and hug him, feel his strong arms around me again, instead I stared out of the window willing my mind to come up with something to say.  
  
"So, how have you been?" He asked as the coffee was placed infront of us.  
  
"Ok, you?"  
  
"Warn out to be honest but ah I might be getting a week off."  
  
"Oh that's good." I smiled and looked down at my hands.  
  
"I was ah wondering if you could get a week off aswell? I mean you don't have to but if you want I thought we could spend some time together or..."  
  
"I can ask!" I smiled.  
  
"Oh cool." he smiled back at me.  
  
Again we sat in silence, God it was hard. Eventually he laughed & I gave him a strange look.  
  
"Well look at us two!" he shook his head.  
  
"Yeah pretty pathetic huh?"  
  
"Wanna get out of here?"  
  
"Sure." I smiled and we stood up and left.  
  
We walked for a long time,just talking about his job, my job, the weather, anything to make conversation. I loved the sound of his voice, I just wished I could think of something to say but my mind was blank. Eventually he stopped and turned me around, "So, you wanna go away when we have this week off?"  
  
"I haven't even got the week off yet!" I smiled.  
  
"Yeah but you will right?"  
  
"Probably! I can't think of the last time I had a holiday!"  
  
"So?"  
  
"Oh erm yeah sure! You have anywhere in mind?"  
  
"Maybe!" He smiled and shrugged his shoulders. As we started to walk again his hand found mine and I felt his fingers curl around and clutch it tightly.   
  
We walked a little further and again he stopped and pulled me towards him. We looked at each other for a while and he touched my cheek and smiled. "We're still married right?"  
  
"Um yeah!"  
  
"So I can do this...." he leaned in and kissed me, pulling me close and running his hands up my back, taking my breath away. ".....and no one can complain right?"  
  
"No, I wouldn't have thought so!" I smiled.  
  
"So I can do it again?"  
  
"I hope you do!" I stared at him and he smiled before kissing me again. 


	30. Part 30

Such Is Life   
  
Part 30  
  
He asked me to go to Raw that night, a lot of the Smackdown guys were going and I wanted to catch up with Shawn so I went. It was a great show and once again I got that proud feeling back when Chris came out, no matter how much heat he got from the crowd, he did his job brilliantly as always. Afterwards I caught up with Shawn and he was pleased to hear we had made some kind of progress, I was just glad we were talking again!  
  
Chris and I travelled back to the hotel together and went to the bar for a drink with the rest of the guys. All the time everyone was laughing and getting drunk I would catch Chris looking at me among the crowd, smiling, it was nice to see him smile again. After a couple of hours people started to drift off to their rooms and eventually we were left alone in the bar. We sat away from the last few hangers on, in a quiet corner and he reached across and held my hand as we talked, toying with my fingers absentmindedly.  
  
"So you think you can get the time off?"  
  
"Probably."  
  
"Can't you ask now?"  
  
"You're crazy!" I laughed and shook my head, "I have to do Smackdown tomorrow night!"  
  
"They will live without you I'll have a word with Steph!"  
  
"And what if Matt splits his pants and I'm not there to fix them?" I laughed.  
  
"I'm sure he can get Shannon to fix them!" Chris winked at me and we laughed.  
  
"Don't let Shannon hear you saying that!"  
  
"What's he gonna do? Bitch slap me to death?"  
  
"Chris!" I playfully punched his arm, "Shannon's a good guy!"  
  
"Yeah I know I'm just joking!" He laughed, 'So, how about you find out in the morning then we take off in the afternoon?"  
  
"Tomorrow?"  
  
"Why not?"  
  
"Oh right, I just thought you meant like in a few days!"  
  
"I can't wait a few days!" he squeezed my hand, "I want my wife back!"  
  
I looked across the table and smiled at him, I wanted him back just as much, I didn't feel whole without him somehow, it was a weird feeling, kind of emptyness, like something missing. "I'll ask in the morning!" I said and he smiled. "But I guess I should go to bed."  
  
"Ok."  
  
We looked at each other for a while, just lost in each others eyes & it took all my willpower to stand up and pull my hand from his.  
  
"So I'll ah..." I looked at my feet, 'I'll see you in the morning then yeah?"  
  
"I'll walk you up if you like?"  
  
"No need, well I mean you can if you want to but ah..."  
  
"It's up to you!" He smiled and shrugged his shoulders.  
  
"Ok then." I forced a smile but I felt nervous. We walked to the elevator and once again I felt his fingers curl around mine and it made my heart skip a beat.  
  
Outside my room I turned to face him. "I think we've been here once before." I smiled.  
  
"Yeah, I remember it well. Hard to believe how long ago it was."  
  
"Yeah tell me about it."  
  
"We're getting old babe!" he put his arms around my shoulders and pulled me close.  
  
"Speak for yourself asshole!" I said as I burried my head into his chest.  
  
"Ya know what you told me that night, that you..."  
  
"That I had never kissed anyone before? Yeah I remember!" I laughed and he held me at arms length.  
  
"Was it true?"  
  
"You doubt me?" I raised my eyebrows.  
  
"No well I just find it hard to believe that's all."  
  
"Yeah well it was true!"  
  
"So, since you were with me and everything does that mean it's still true, apart from me?"  
  
I smiled, "You find that hard to believe aswell?"  
  
"Hell no! I mean why would you want anyone else when you had me?"  
  
"Watch it Jericho!" I prodded his chest and he laughed.  
  
"Ah I'm sorry I just, well I guess it's kinda nice to think that you havent...well ya know!"  
  
"Yeah I know." I smiled. "So, I guess I better go to bed then."  
  
"Oh ok." He looked at his feet, "I'll see you in the morning!" He went to kiss my cheek and I turned my face around to capture his lips on mine and he kissed me passionately, it was hard to say goodnight and watch him walk along the corridor, but it was for the best. 


	31. Part 31

Such Is Life  
  
Part 31  
  
Next morning I asked for my time off and got it! I went to look for Chris to tell him the good news and when he was no where around I figured he was still in his room so Imade my way back up and knocked on the door, no answer.  
  
"Chris?" I shouted.  
  
"It's open." he mumbled, still obviously asleep. I smiled as I pushed the door open and saw him half in and half out of the bed with one eye open.  
  
"Hi." he groaned. "What time is it?"  
  
"It's after 8! Sorry I didn't mean to wake you!"  
  
"It's ok." He said through a yawn.  
  
"I ah just wanted to tell you I got the time off!"  
  
"You did?" I nodded. "Aw man that's great news! Come here!" He patted the bed beside him and I went over and sat down. "What don't I even get a hug?"  
  
I smiled and lay down on top of the douvet and he put his arm around me and held me close to his chest. "So where are we going then?"  
  
"It's a surprise!"  
  
"Just tell me! I don't like surprises!"  
  
"You'll like this one!" he kissed the top of my head, "Well I hope you will!"  
  
"Now I'm worried!"  
  
"Don't be!" he squeezed me tight and ran his hand up and down my arm. God I had missed that so much, just being close to him, being held by him. I wrapped my arm over his waist and snuggled my head into his chest and we fell asleep. I didn't even think I was tired, I think it was just the comfort of being wrapped in his arms, I hadn't felt that relaxed in months.  
  
It was just after 10am when Jason barged into the room yelling that Chris was a lazy bastard and was gonna be late! I jumped and sat bolt upright!  
  
"Oh shit! I ah...sorry I..."  
  
"Jay you fucking asshole I'm off for the week!" Chris moaned and rubbed his eyes.  
  
"Oh shit man I'm sorry I forgot!" Jason ran a hand through his hair, "Look I'll erm go, leave you to it! Sorry!" he smiled at me.  
  
"It's ok."  
  
"Jason don't look at me like that this is my wife! Chrissy meet shit stain!" Chris flopped back onto the bed and put his heands over his face.  
  
"Wife? Oh man! Hey! I've heard a lot about you!" He held out his hand and I shook it and smiled. "I'll go! Sorry again!"  
  
"It's fine really!" I smiled, "Nice to meet you!"  
  
"See ya next week then Chris! Have fun!"  
  
"Yeah see ya!" Chris sighed as Jay closed the door. "Asshole!"  
  
"He was only trying to help!"  
  
"Yeah I know! He's a nice guy really I was just enjoying the sleep!" he smiled.  
  
'Me too!" I stretched, "Maybe you need to lock your door more often!" I laughed remembering his note.  
  
"Yeah but then how would you have gotten in?" He pulled me back down onto the bed.  
  
"I would have knocked until I woke you up!"  
  
"Come here!" He pressed his lips against mine and kissed me deeply, slowly, while running his hands through my hair.  
  
"Mm, Chris don't we need to be going somewhere?"  
  
"Not yet, we can stay here a while longer!" he smiled and kissed me again.  
  
"Ok well...maybe you should lock the door at least?"  
  
"Good point!" he jumped off the bed and locked the door. We didn't leave his room until after 2pm that day. 


	32. Part 32

Such Is Life  
  
Part 32  
  
We got into a cab outside the hotel and Chris put his arm around me as we sat in the back seat.  
  
"I wish you would tell me where we are going!"  
  
"Relax would you!" he squeezed my shoulders, "It'll be sweet!"  
  
We got out of the cab at the airport and I eyed him suspiciously. He just laughed and grabbed the bags and we went inside. I was made to wait while he picked up the tickets.  
  
"Chris I will know as soon as they announce the damn flight where we are going!" I laughed.  
  
"Yeah well I need to get the last few minutes of suspense out of you don't I!" He put the bags on the floor and put his arms around me as we stood in the airport watching everyone hurrying around.  
  
"Excuse me are you Chris Jericho?" A woman tapped Chris on the shoulder and he let me go and turned around smiling. She went into a whole long story about how her son has watched wrestling all his life and would kill for an autograph blah blah. I stood back politely letting her spend her '5 minutes' with the great Chris Jericho, hopefully we were going somewhere where no one would know or care who he was! This happened several times while we waited for the flight and he kept appologising to me but I didn't mind really. Chris always did talk to fans and sign autographs I suppose it had just gotten a little 'bigger' since his days in WcW! I would just have to get used to it all over again. Eventually there was a flight announced and Chris put his hands over my ears and I playfully shoved him away.  
  
"Was that ours?"  
  
"Yup!"  
  
"What did it say? Come on!"  
  
"It said please board the flight to Lapland and Santa will meet you off the plane!"  
  
"You are such an idiot!" I shook my head.  
  
"Ok ok I'll tell you but it'll cost ya!" he grinned and wrapped his arms around my waist again.  
  
"Oh yeah?" I raised my eyebrows and he kissed me. "It's that easy?"  
  
"Hell yeah! I'm pretty easy to keep happy ya know!" he smiled at me.  
  
"So?"  
  
"How would you feel about comming to meet my parents?"  
  
"YOUR WHAT!?"  
  
"You heard me! We're going to Canada! I thought it was about time I introduced them to my wife!"  
  
I felt sick! "Chris you're kidding me? Your parents? You haven't seen your parents in years and I don't think this is the reunion they invisioned!"  
  
"Wrong!" He picked up the bags, "I have seen them quite a lot the last year or so, well since we...ya know...split up and everything. Besides I already told them we're comming!"  
  
"You did? You have? Oh Lord!"  
  
He laughed, "Would you relax! They are looking forward to meeting you!"  
  
"We're going to Canada?" I looked at him and bit my lip.  
  
"We are!"  
  
"Oh my god! What if they hate me?"  
  
Chris laughed and started to walk away shaking his head. "We're only gonna be there like 3 days and then we're going somewhere else!"  
  
"What?" My head was spinning. "Chris wait up!" I grabbed his arm. "Stop doing this to me!" I laughed. "Where are we going?"  
  
"Wait and see!" He smiled and kissed me. I didn't know what the hell I was letting myself in for! 


	33. Part 33

Such Is Life  
  
Part 33  
  
So there we were on a plane to meet his parents! I was nervous as hell it wasn't what I expected at all! He held me all the way there, we didn't speak much but my mind was going crazy! I was so worried they were going to hate the person that married their son without them even knowing about it! I didn't have that problem, I mean sure I had a father somewhere but he so obviously didn't give a crap about me and therefore why should I be telling him anything?  
  
We landed in Canada and got our bags. He could see how nervous I was without even asking and smiled as he put his arm around me and led me into the arrivals lounge.  
  
"It will be sweet will you not panick?"  
  
"I can't help it!"  
  
"Oh there's my dad!"  
  
My stomach flipped as he pointed out a guy over the other side of the lounge. He looked a lot like Chris, older, darker hair but everything else was an amazing resemblance!   
  
"Oh boy!" I whispered and puffed out my cheeks as I smoothed my hair. Chris smiled and kissed the top of my head as he led me over. He hugged his Dad then stapped back, "And this is your daughter-in-law!"  
  
I took a deep breath and forced a smile as Chris' dad looked me over for what seemed like a lifetime!  
  
"He always did have good taste in women!" he smiled. "Ted!" he held out his hand and I took it.  
  
"Chris...Christina!"  
  
"Very nice to finally meet you at last!"  
  
"You aswell." I looked at my feet.  
  
"Right come on then let's get your two home, I'm sure there will be something good cooking when we get back!" He picked up one of the bags and Chris got the other one, put his arm around my shoulders and we walked out into the sunshine.   
  
"Told ya it'd be sweet!" Chris whispered into my ear as his dad put the bags into the trunk of his car. He looked around making sure he wasn't watching and kissed me passionately. I pulled back embarassed.  
  
"Chris!" I glared at him and he smiled.  
  
"Hey your my wife! I'm sure he won't mind!" he kissed me again and his dad coughed loudly.  
  
"Ready?" He had a sly smile on his face, just like Chris, it was uncanny and it made me smile through my embarassment.  
  
When we arrived at the house my nerves started to build again. Chris and his dad had talked non stop all the way there and I just sat in silence, totally dreading getting there and meeting his mother then the thought occoured to me that he'd met mine, how could she be any worse than that!? Still I felt like I wanted to run as fast as I could away from there as we got out of the car, no the wonder he hadn't told me where we were going! I probably would have gotten out of it somehow, but if this made him happy then I had to go through with it! I was willing to try anything to get this relationship back on track and I supposed if we had done things like any other normal couple I'd have been through the 'meet the folks' scenario a long time before then! 


	34. Part 34

Such Is Life  
  
Part 34  
  
His Mother was as nice as his Dad, I don't know why I expected any less with Chris for a son they couldn't exactly be axe murderers, then again look at my own family! We ate a nice dinner and I avoided the subject of my background as much as I possibly could, I told them my mother was dead but left out the gruesome details, I just said I'd lost touch with my father, hell they knew how that went they hadn't seen Chris in a long time after he got his developmental contract. After dinner his mother showed me into the lounge and proceeded to get the family albums out, very amusing pictures of Chris throughout the years, much to his embarassment! It did make me realise how little I knew about him, I'd married him without ever meeting his family, I just knew it was right at the time, his past didn't matter to me.Now things felt different, I felt the need to know hoping maybe that it would bring us closer together. I would've tried anything right then just to make it work.  
  
Chris and his dad got onto the subject of cars and he took him out back to show him his latest...whatever it was! To me a car was a car and I would be quite happy to still have the one we used to virtually live in as long as it had four wheels and actually moved! So I was left alone with his mother, feeling a little awkward and wondering what she was going to ask next!  
  
"He seems very happy with you!" She smiled as she handed me a cup of coffee.  
  
"Thanks, wellI hope so. It hasn't exactly been easy up to this point."  
  
"Well we did hear somethings but, well you know men, not one for telling their mothers much!" She laughed.  
  
Great! She was fishing for details,jsut what I needed. "Oh well we're getting there that's what counts!" I took a sip of my coffee.  
  
"Well you can imagine how surprised we were to hear he was married." She sighed, "I don't know I suppose I always invisioned a big wedding and me the proud mother!" She smiled, "But as long as he's happy that's all that counts!"  
  
"Yeah." I smiled and looked away nervously.  
  
"So erm...I only made up one room for the both of you is that right or...?"  
  
"Ah...I guess that's ok thankyou." I was willing Chris to come back in! She wasn't a bad person, infact she was taking this all rather calmly under the circumstances! I doubted I would be so collected if I was in this situatuion! It was just that I didn't know her & yet I'd married her son! It was an awkward situation and although she was trying her best to be friendly I could still sense that she needed more information & I wasn't sure how much Chris wanted her to know about our life together!  
  
"Hey! I hope she hasn't got my prom photos out yet!" Chris smiled as he walked in and put his arm around me when he sat down beside me. I tried not to heave a sigh of relief and I couldn't help but notice his mother's look of slight disapointment.  
  
"Steph I hope you aren't boring the girl to death!" Ted laughed and winked at his wife and she waved him away dismissively as we all laughed.  
  
"I was just telling Christina here that I only made up one room for the both of you but I wasn't sure that..."  
  
"That's fine mom."  
  
"Steeeph!" Ted raised his eyebrows. "Leave the kids alone and stop fishing!" He walked intothe kitchen.  
  
"I was not fishing Ted Irvine!" She snapped back and we laughed.  
  
"Come and help me with the dishes woman!" he shouted playfully and she stood up and rolled her eyes as she walked into the kitchen.  
  
"Thank God!" Chris wrapped his arms around me. "Alone at last!" he grinned and kissed me.  
  
"Yeah they are only in the next room!" I playfully shoved him.  
  
"That's far enough away for now!" he leaned in and kissed me again and I welcomed it. "So, what do you think?"  
  
"Of your folks?" He nodded, "I think they are very good people and I don't know why I was so nervous!"  
  
"Told you!" he smiled and held me close, I put my head onis chest. "They seem to like you!"  
  
"They do?"  
  
"Hmm yeah, Mom's being waaay too cool about this whole thing though, you must have impressed her!"  
  
"Nah I think secretly she wants to strangle me!"  
  
"Maybe she will when we're asleep!" Chris put his hands around my throat, "I'll get you for marrying my son!" he said in a silly high pitched voice.  
  
*Cough* We turned around nad his mother was standing in the doorway. Chris slowly took his hands away from my neck and I Looked away biting on my lip! "Mom." he said quietly.  
  
"I was going to suggest we go to a movie tonight but I see you've made your own entertainment!" She turned and went back into the kitchen.  
  
MOM!" Chris shouted then put his head on my shoulder.  
  
"Go on!" I pushed him off me.  
  
"What?"  
  
"I'm not saving your ass! Go and grovel!"  
  
"I was gonna let her simmer down a..."  
  
"Go on!" I pointed to the kitchen door with a sly smirk on my face and he snarled at me and stood up.  
  
"You do realise this is it I mean I won't come back out of there alive!"  
  
"Just go and appologise you whimp!" I laughed as he walked into the kitchen. 


	35. Part 35

Such Is Life  
  
Part 35  
  
He made it up with his Mom and we went out to the cinema and saw some cheesy movie. When we got back I was beat and thanked them for the evening and headed to bed. I just crawled between the covers when I heard Chris comming into the room.  
  
"You asleep?" he whispered.  
  
"Nope!"  
  
He sat on the edge of the bed I could just make out his outline in the dark of the room as he touched my arm, "I'll sleep on the floor."   
  
"Is that what you want?" I grabbed his arm as he stood up and he stopped, "No that's not what I want I thought maybe it was what you wanted?"  
  
"It's not."I said quietly.  
  
"Sure?I mean I dont mind if.."  
  
"Im sure." I whispered. I lay there and watched him getting undressed in the darkness, then he crawled in beside me and wrapped his arms around me.  
  
"You think we're gonna be ok?" He said into my ear as we lay together.  
  
"I dont know Chris." I sighed, "I hope so, I mean I really hope so." I traced my finger along his arm and he kissed the back of my head.  
  
"Me too. I missed you!"  
  
I smiled to myself, God I never thought this day would come when we would be in the same bed again! "Chris?"  
  
"Hmm?"  
  
"I love you." He rolled me over onto my back and looked at me.  
  
"Truely?"  
  
"Yes!" I laughed.  
  
"Honestly?"  
  
"Yes!"  
  
"Good because mom wants us to renew our wedding vows!"  
  
"What?" I sat up underneath him.  
  
"I know I know but she missed out on the first time and..." He sighed, "Its ok we dont have to."  
  
"It's too soon to even talk about that Chris, I mean maybe sometime but....not now ok?"  
  
"Ok, suits me!" He smiled and kissed me. "She means well ya know?"  
  
"I know she does!" I laughed, "She's sweet."  
  
"Not as sweet as you!" he touched my cheek and I felt his lips on mine, his tongue exploring my mouth as he lay on top of me.  
  
The next couple of days were speant with his folks and it was nice! I had fun, we did 'family' stuff, things that I had never done before with my own family because my mother was too screwed up! When it came time to leave I was kind of sad! I felt sorry for Chris' mom she was crying and kept hugging him all the time telling him she was going to miss him and that we had to come back soon! I wished my mother could have done that even once in my lifetime! We got to the airport and said goodbye to his dad.  
  
"So now where?" I asked as we dragged our bags across to the terminal.  
  
"Well..." He pointed up at the screen above our gate.  
  
"FLORIDA?"  
  
"We're going home!" he smiled and put his arm around my shoulders, "Unless you can think of some where else to go?"  
  
"Home sounds great to me!" I smiled as he squeezed me.  
  
"Home it is then!" He kissed the top of my head and we went to get on the plane. 


	36. Part 36

Such Is Life  
  
Part 36  
  
We got off the plane back in Florida and got into a cab.  
  
"Cant wait to get home!" Chris grinned at me like there was something he wasn't telling me.  
  
"Ok what are you plotting?" I said as he put his arm around me in the cab.  
  
"Me? Plotting? I dont plot!"  
  
"Yeah you do!" I laughed.  
  
"Ok well maybe a little surprise but you will have to wait and see wont you!"  
  
"I dont know if I like the look on your face buddy!"  
  
"Relax will you, and come here and kiss me!" He smiled and I looked up and kissed him.  
  
When we parted and I looked out of the window I realised we werent going the right way toget back to the appartment. "Where are we going this isnt the way home!"  
  
"Wait and see!" He smiled.  
  
"Chris!"  
  
"Just wait all will become apparent in a few minutes!" he squeezed me close to him.  
  
5 minutes later the cab stopped on a street I didn't recognise and Chris opened the door. "Come on we're here!"  
  
"Where's here though?" I raised my eyebrows as he held out his hand to help me out of the car. He paid the driver and picked up our bags.  
  
"Follow me!"  
  
We walked around the corner and he put the bags down and put his hands over my eyes.  
  
"What are you doing!" I giggled.  
  
"Just keep walking I'll guide you!"  
  
"Chris!"  
  
"Do you trust me?"  
  
"Yes but..."  
  
"Well then stop complaining and keep walking!" He pushed me forwards still with his hands over my eyes.  
  
"Ok where are we now?"  
  
"Up a step....step....step.." he instrusted me as we climbed some steps, "Right hold on don't open your eyes ok?"  
  
"But..."  
  
"Promise me you wont open your eyes!"  
  
"Ok ok I promsie!"I laughed and he took his hands away as I squeezed my eyes shut. I heard something rattle like keys and then he put his hands over my eyes again. "You have got me worried now!"  
  
'Keep walking..oh step up!" I did as he asked then all of a sudden I felt myself being picked up into his arms and I screamed as he put me over his shoulder.  
  
"Keep them closed!" he laughed.  
  
"Ok I am! What are you doing? Put me down!"   
  
"Ok..." He put me down and stood behind me, "Now open them!"  
  
Slowly I opened my eyes, infront of me was a huge swimming pool set in a beautiful garden. Green lawns, white pavements, decking, it was so gorgeous it almost took my breath away. "What the..."  
  
"You like?"  
  
"Wow it's.....wow!" He put his arms around my waist from behind as I scanned around the garden. The pool was a brilliant blue colour twinkling in the Miami sunshine, the whole sight was like something from a movie!  
  
"So....." he turned me around to face him, "You wont mind that I bought it then?"  
  
"You what?!" My eyes widned.  
  
"We wanted a big house, with a pool right? In Florida! I remembered! I thought you might like it!"  
  
I was speechless, I couldnt believe he'd bought this place and I hadnt even seen the house! "This....this is yours?"  
  
"No, it's ours!" he smiled.  
  
"Oh Chris!" I threw my arms around his neck.  
  
"Told you we'd make it didnt I?"  
  
"Yeah you did!" I smiled with tears in my eyes.  
  
"Well....WE MADE IT BABY!" He lifted me up in his arms and I laughed.  
  
"You're crazy ya know that! Totally off the chart mental!" I shook my head and laughed.  
  
"Yeah I'm crazy I know! That's why you love me right?"  
  
"That and the rest!" I smiled and kissed his lips.  
  
"So you wanna see the bedroom now?!" He wiggled his eyebrows and I laughed. 


	37. Part 37

Such is Life  
  
Part 37  
  
ok guys here it is - the last chapter! Sorry I took so long to finish it but those of you that know me know I dont do mush very well! Lol anyway here goes hope you like it as much as you liked the other chapters! Thanks for all the reviews you guys are too kind!  
  
When eventually we came out of the bedroom I discovered that the rest of the house was as impressive as the outside had been. I was totally in awe and couldn't believe it was happening. Not only did I have the love of my life back with me but we finally had gotten our dream home. The one we had envisioned on so many nights while trying to sleep in crappy motels and even in the car! We were freezing, hungry and full of dreams and those dreams were comming true one at a time! I smiled at Chris as he finished giving me the tour of the house and put my arms around his neck.  
  
"I cant believe it Chris seriously, it's too....mind blowing!"  
  
He smiled and kissed my lips, "I want us back!" he whispered, "I want us to be happy again and live in this beautiful house and have lots of babies!"  
  
"Oh babies huh?"  
  
"Yeah like 10!"  
  
"In your dreams buddy! I am not giving birth 10 times!"  
  
"Well ok how about once for starters, you never know you might actually like it!"  
  
"Chris.." I sighed, 'Not right now ok? we need to sort us out before we even think about babies."  
  
"But you're not saying never right?"  
  
"No, Im saying not now!" I smiled, "Is that ok?"  
  
"That's better than ok because that means you want to sort us out!"  
  
"I do, more than anything! Chris I'd go back to living in the car if we got back what we had then!"  
  
"Me too!" he smiled and held me close to him. "How about you transfere and get a job on Raw then we can be together?"  
  
I stepped backwards and looked at him, "I dont think that's a good idea either!"  
  
"What?" His eyes widened.  
  
"Look I think if we are on the seperate shows then...." I sighed not sure how to explain this without hurting him.  
  
"Then we wont argue all the time?"  
  
"Yes exactly!" I heaved a sigh of relief.   
  
"Ok if that's what you want then it's ok by me! I just want us back on track!" He pulled me to him again, "I missed you so much babe!"  
  
"I missed you too Chris! I love you!"  
  
So we went back to work on the seperate shows, everything was fine apart from not having that much time to spend in this beautiful new house we had. But staying on the different shows had been a good idea, we didnt see that much of each other but when we did it was like old times again, only we were warm and dry and fed!  
  
It was exactly a year after Chris bought the house, almost to the day, when I found out I was pregnant. I was a little shocked, it was sooner than I had wanted but just the look on his face when I told him made up for all of that. He was so supportive during the pregnancy and he was there for the birth. We had a boy, he's 2 now, blonde hair, looks just like Chris and he keeps me busy running around after him all day! And as I finish this story I am pregnant again, hopefully Chris isnt getting his wish of 10 children but what can I say, I can never say no to him, never have been able to! When I think back now to the days when I was following my mother around from town to town, all the 'uncles' all the sleepless nights worrying about whether she would wake up in the morning, I cant belive what I have and how far I have come. I feel so lucky, so blessed. In some ways I wish she, my mother, was here to see what I have done with my life if only just for her to see I hadnt done what she did, made the same mistakes, slept with a hundred guys. I tried to contact my father in England on several occasions but without success, his loss I suppose.   
  
Shawn is still close to me, to us should I say! He adores the baby and I love him like a real Uncle, he helped me through a lot of crap that I couldnt see a way out of and I will be eternally greatful to him for that. He's married himself now with kids, I cant help thinking what a lucky escape he had when my mother died. Cruel? Maybe, but living with her was crueller, she had the tendancy to suck the life out of people and would have done the same with Shawn had she lived.  
  
So....that's it, my life, my story! Not the most exciting of lives I'll admit but hopefully there is a lot of life left in me and a lot more things to do as I watch my children grow up and Chris and I grow old together! Makes me laugh, I can never imagine him getting any older, he'll always be my Chris, my clown. 


End file.
